Sweet Pea is a tough one

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Ktllc, Apr 23, 2012.

  1. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    Is she a difficult child to be? I seriously start to wonder. At 20 months old, she is a handful!! Of course, all toddlers are a handful. But she displays certain paterns that reminds me of V... not the sweet memories, the ones I wish I would not have to go through again.
    Always wanting to be carried on my hip, cries as soon as she sees me (let's say I'm out of sight and she is content with husband, and then sees me), huge tantrums when things don't go her way. Terror at home, little angel who does not make a sound at daycare (despite the occasional cry, they have almost never heard her voice).
    It just seems so familiar. Of course, V talked in sentences at that age. And Sweet Pea is non verbal. That is a big difference and I guess could account for a lot frustration for Sweet Pea... but despite her lack of words, she has good communication (Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) agrees).
    The first few days my parents were here, my mother never stopped telling me what a little angel she is. I just smiled and said that indeed she was an angle right now. Oh boy, did my mother take those words back later!! She then called her a terror. Once again, I agreed that she ALSO and most of the time is a terror.
    She can sleep good, but most nights will wake up and wonder through the house. Once again, V used to do the same (until 8 months ago).
    I can see some sensory issues: refuse to wear sandals without socks, refused to be barefoot at the beach, diapers bother her (she is the happiest naked), can't stand for her hands to be dirty, does not like swings (even baby swings used to make her cry like she was being tortured).
    At her age, there are obviously not much to do... I'm tired and feel somewhat powerless at this point.
    Another round of "wait and see" was not what I wished for.
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    ((((HUGS)))) Hoovers, doesn't it? At least your first one is a easy child!

    I still can't decide if my third is actually 'neurotypical' or a latent Aspie.
  3. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    My two are now teenagers, and...
    ... we're STILL in "wait and see" mode.

  4. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    :consoling:.........we may all be in 'wait and see mode', difficult child land, where angels fear to tread............hang in there and take very good care of YOU. I'm sending you hugs, lots of hugs...........
  5. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    Sorry you are going through this. Sounds like you are feeling like fate has dealt you a tough hand... Understandable. On the other hand... forewarned is forearmed and you have done such a fantastic job in getting help and evaluation for V that you are in a good position to do the same for your daughter, if need be. You are bound to feel all that you are feeling... very natural. It's like a process to acceptance, isn't it. I am still struggling with that, personally. Hugs.
  6. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    Besides this board, I really have not complained in public about Sweet Pea's tantrums. At this age, it's to be expected right? But every 5 minutes, really?
    She has speech today, and she was all over the place. I signed the report of the day, and he described her as "tempermental" during the session... not sure I like the word, but he's right.
    My head is ready to explode, I actually closed the door behind me to seat on the porch alone and try to get 3 minutes of peace.
    Sure she already is in early intervention, but how many tantrums is too many?? I remember calling the program when V was about the same age (deja vue) and they just told me he was fine, just over attached to me.
    Gosh, I read about all those posts saying that it's hard to know until kids turn 8 or 9.... That is a long time banging your head on a brick wall.
  7. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    ktllc- gosh, it sounds like a lot to deal with! I read as many posts as I can get to each day and I have to say, to those of you with young kids who face these issues every single day, all I can say is you all should get Academy Awards, Pulitzer prizes, Nobel prizes, Congressional medals of honor, acknowledgments on every front for everything, I am amazed at what you deal with and how you cope and how much you love your kids and how much you just 'do.' You are all remarkable and I know it's mostly a thankless job where you get to go insane everyday and perhaps, except for us here on this board, no one may even notice. Well, I'm noticing and I just want to say thank you, thank you for doing the very best you can, with little support "out there," against mounting odds with tenuous support systems in place and with so much love in your hearts for your 'babies.' Gee, I'm at a loss for words here, God bless every parent on this site for a job well done..........