Taking my daughter to college today. Excited and Numb

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Jody, Sep 2, 2010.

  1. Jody

    Jody Active Member

    I am excited for her to go and scared that I am not crying and having more emotion. Scared it's going to come all at once. Everyone has expected me to be a basketcase and I am just not. I am so pleased with who she is and where she is going in life that I am just so happy. I am so totaly sure that I am going to have bad days and good days, and that a lot of the emotions haven't come yet. But I am blessed. Maybe I am pretty well medicated. Don't know yet, but right now I am not feeling sad. I am happy that she is going to have this awesome experience that I was unable to have and become so smart, and have such fun. Tomorrow when I l leave without her it will probably hit me. Pray for me, whatever it is that you wonderful people do that will help get me thru tomorrow, and also court today about difficult child. She's not coming home but still have to go to court. Ugh, what a day today.
  2. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    I was fine all along up until the moment we actually got back in our truck to leave her behind. I too was so happy for easy child to be realizing her dreams and so happy to see her mature and grow into who she wanted to be - yadda yadda yadda - and all that gooey stuff, hahaha.

    But then, we pulled away and I just could not turn off the water works. It wasn't about being sad, it was simply about turning a page, ending a chapter and beginning a new one - for both of us, for ALL of us. Our family dynamic was about to shift a little bit. It was a good kind of cry, happy, sad, scared, excited and everything all thrown in together.

    Bring tissues, just in case.
  3. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    Oh, Jody! You have done a terrific job raising your daughter. You are blessed to have each other. I will be thinking of you both today.
  4. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I remember those "drive away" moments with the easy child's. They were just about as emotional as the "drive away" moments leaving easy child/difficult child at various rehabs. Parenting really is gut wrenching, isn't it? Hugs. DDD
  5. Mom2oddson

    Mom2oddson Active Member

    I too, did great until we pulled away from the college parking lot. Then it was me, my Mom, my Sister, and difficult child-S all crying. husband called as we were leaving, the only one able to talk to husband was my Dad. But, my Dad got us all laughing when he told husband..."They want us to believe that they are crying because they will be missing easy child, but the truth is that there is now a man out in the world not being controlled by women and it just tears them apart."

    Bring your kleenex. It is just such a wonderful and exciting time. But it is a bittersweet day. Our babies are growing up. All I could see as easy child walked away was the little kid that I sent off to kindergarden. Yet I was so proud of him. Hang in there. You'll make it through just fine. You might go through a few kleenex, but you will be fine.
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Stop worrying about what others expect you to do and enjoy the moments!! You will only drop your oldest child off at college for the first time once. Be present in every minute. You have done a fabulous job raising this young woman and she is starting the next phase of her life today. Celebrate who she is, who you are, your relationship and this wonderful bittersweet occasion!! When the tears come, let them fall unashamedly, be present for thosemoments also, and let yourself feel every single emotion as it pops up.

    You have a great deal to be extremely proud of, in both children. The oldest is off to the next wonderful adventure, equipped to live it fully and experience everything life has to offer. Your other daughter is very strong, and you have fought hard to get the best possible help for her, including getting others to be the "village" that is needed for her to grow up to be as healthy as possible in every way, smart and very determined. There are a whole lot of ways that things could be very different. You are even teaching your youngest how to stand up for herself when others try to abuse her - teaching her by example, which is one of the most powerful and profound ways of teaching.

    Of course we will be there for court, anything you ask! Many many hugs and hopes it all goes well tomorrow.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I have never dropped one off at college but I so remember dropping my son off to be taken to boot camp for the Marines. We had to drive him up to meet up at the place where a bus would pick up all the recruits to take them down to Parris Island. All the way there we were just kind of quietly talking. Not much joking around or anything. The war had started less than a year before so we all knew what he was getting in to. It was a sobering ride. When we had to leave him after just a few minutes, we were all in tears. We knew we wouldnt hear from him except by letter for a long, long time. Tony and I cried buckets of tears the whole way home. Oddly enough, it rained that night.
  8. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Enjoy it, Jody!
  9. Jody

    Jody Active Member

    Well we had a great time, and I hardly cried at all. it's a dream come true and she is so excited to see it realized and me too. Thank you for all the support. Court went well for difficult child, I will see her today for therapy. Have a great day everyone.
  10. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Sends kleenex and rope - to keep you tied together - literally and figuratively.

    CONGRATULATIONS....O.M.G. I have ANOTHER neice in college. I feel......SO Smart!

    Hugs - issss gonna be allllllllright Momma
  11. Jena

    Jena New Member

    wow, college and the send off soo great!!! I'm glad you had a great day and soo nice to hear how proud you are of her and that you are happy about who she is and where she is going. Good job MOM!!
  12. Jody

    Jody Active Member

    Okay, now I am missing her. Hoping the phone rings and she calls me. Find out what her address is so I can send her a package and card. I called her one time and she said I was just getting ready to call you. I am going to wait for her to call. Hope it's soon. The college said we could expect one call a week from our kids. I guess I am really going to have to get used to that. Is taht all we really can expect to hear from them. 52 times a year minus holidays, and when they need money. It's raining and dreary here today. I think it might be giving me a case of the blues. Sorry.
  13. Mattsmom277

    Mattsmom277 Active Member

    No need to be sorry. Missing her is natural and I can totally understand you feeling how you do. I too can't imagine that if my difficult child does move on his own next year, how I'll stop myself from calling him every day. I promised both my kids I wouldn't be that pesty mother when they are on their own. I know i'll sit on my dialing fingers if I have to, in order to not smother them and to allow them to live their own lives. But I'm the same as you, wondering how on earth to only hear from them say once a week etc. I'm sure it will get easier once you two find a balance that works for you both with how often you are in touch. Some kids want to hear from their parents more often, some don't. Has your daughter said how often she is okay with you calling? Can't hurt to ask her what amount would make her feel connected and thought of and loved versus smothered or stalked by her mama bear lol. Might turn out that she wants more than once a week contact.
  14. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Ohhh, Jody, I am so happy for you. What a week, eh?

    Many hugs.

    And about that one-phonecall-a-week? It tapers off after a couple weeks. Then they call when they need money. It hoovers. ;)