Teachers/School are idiots!-Venting!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Pookybear66, Sep 29, 2008.

  1. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    Hi all,
    I already know the answer to this, but how do I write an email nicely and ask teachers/school to review IEP and/or meet with me when all I want to do is call them a bunch of bumbling idiots??

    My ds has IEP that was put in place end of last school year (so just in May 08) for help in school because of learning disability/reading problems in particular. Today he comes home with a language arts test they gave him. Which he says he took with his Learning Support teacher. Anyway, he got a 56% on it. I looked at it and went "HUH??"
    He should be having the comprehension/plot/and specific story question parts read to him and asked in some different ways because he knows the answers when he just reviewed it with me. It was about a story from his reading text which he cannot read by himself with-o struggling and taking 2 hrs to finish.

    It also had on it spelling and alphabetical order he had to circle the correct one. Well, those are some of his other areas of weakness. He cannot just look at a word and know what it is sometimes. He has to compare letter for letter and this takes extra time. He completely skipped the writing part-cause HE HATES WRITING! Agg, it is getting me boiling just to write this. The only part he did well on was the vocabulary cause he is good at big words and understanding their meanings.

    Anyway, I then also find out that his spelling pre-tests that he completes and gets 100% and I thought he was doing excellent on, he is NOT doing by himself. He gets guidance on the correct spelling! And also, there was a "Learner Survey" worksheet he did on his learning style. What a waste of 20min or so. I printed out stuff and told them his learning style last year. I would presume it's in his folder. So needless to say I am very confused at these teachers interpretation of his IEP. How do I calm down enough to write a clear and concise email requesting a review of his IEP and refrain from calling them idiots??
  2. Lillyth

    Lillyth New Member

    You hop on here, vent to us, and do what you do best -- go back and Kick Butt for your son!:sword:

    Sometimes that is all it takes, is just a few people to listen as you vent your frustration at the unfairness of it all...:not_fair:

    Oh, and try climbing on your bed & punching the **** out of all your pillows & stuff, and screaming at the top of your lungs.

    Or go to your local dojo & take it out on the bags...

    I'm sorry your son's school is being so lame...
  3. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    Thanks for your kind words Lillyth! I wish you lived closer to me so we could get together and vent together in real life. I think our kids would getalong pretty well too-maybe!?

    I just needed to get my frustrations out here so I could try to wrap my head around some nice words and ask for a meeting with the teacher a/o IEP personnel. Thanks for caring!
  4. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Ok i totally agree that their all "idiots", but i'm going to try and be the calming force here.....lol dunno if that's possible.

    i've learned certified letter, not email and copy the dingbat teacher on it or whatever staff that works with him. I've recently had alot of issues with my difficult child's school their refusing to send referral to even put an iep in place for her......ugh! anyway i do certified and copied to the staff just to express "nicely" your disgust at their lack of compliance with the iep at hand.

    good luck, ugh is all i can say about schools, i'm sure there are good ones out there that adhere to the rules, but i have yet to find one!!!!!

    let us know how it goes
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    oh yea and what lillyth said about punching things very theraputic, sometimes i drive my truck alone ofcourse and literally scream at the top of my lungs......after i vent here
  6. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Hi Pookybear, my son just got his very first IEP in August (at age 15!). Since it was his first, our educational advocate had us write in the IEP that we would need a 45-day review to make sure the goals were accurate and achievable. At the meetings leading up to the development of the IEP, the team discussed at great length my son's difficulty with written production (most likely a result of anxiety rather than an Learning Disability (LD)). Guess what? He's in a self-contained ED program and failing English because he refuses to write the essays. You can bet this will be at the top of our list for discussion at our meeting in mid-October.

    You, as a parent, can call an IEP meeting at any point. I agree with staying off the phone and computer -- send your requests in writing certified mail or hand-delivered. The website www.wrightslaw.com has some great info on sped law.

    Good luck.
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It is definitely within your right to call an iep meeting. Sometimes just a phone call will do wonders especially if you come at it from "difficult child has been showing me some things and when looking at his IEP I'm concerned with ..."

    I know I would prefer a parent call or email with their concerns. Open communication is so important.

    Most teachers really want to be helping their students and really care. Just like in any profession there are some that aren't as great and yes sometimes seem to be idiots but there really are some good ones out there!
  8. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    Well thank you everyone. I have calmed down enough (after putting kids to bed and watching some TV and stuff) after posting here earlier. What I think I'm gonna do is first send an email to the teacher and Learning Support teacher as well.

    I will be nice and state that I am concerned and curious as to how the test was given. I will ask this because on occasion I do not get the whole story from ds. So I realize I should probably verify what actually is taking place first. (by the way,I did talk to the teacher by phone just about a week ago. She shared my ds's basic schedule and it seemed fine). So, pending what happens with the email discussion, I will call an IEP meeting. We should have had one a few weeks ago just to touch base with everyone NEW this year but I wrongly assumed that they would be the ones calling me. DUH! Live and learn and do it all again tomorrow LOL!

    I don't want to be labeled as a PITA but I guess that's what it takes sometimes. Oh well, I will keep everyone posted. Thanks for listening.
  9. Lillyth

    Lillyth New Member

  10. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    There are ways of saying what you need to say without actually smacking them over the back of the head.

    Here's a start:

    Dear staff,

    Thank you for sending me the results of my son's most recent test. It was a fascinating result, clearly demonstrating just what happens when special provisions aren't followed as stated in the IEP.

    Tests such as these are a valuable tool in assessing not only what students have learned, but also how effectively they can communicate this. Tests are also useful in comparing students with each other.

    As you will know from the information I have ensured has been placed in my son's file, his needs are as follows: [list them].

    You will also know that we have established that tests such as today's will give a more representative answer if certain special provisions are followed: [list provisions already agreed on].

    Now that we have ably demonstrated my son's educational baseline, can we now try this again, but this time with all considerations now in place, along with the appropriate special provisions?

    The information gathered by this process will be invaluable in clearly demonstrating both my son's function difficulties as well as the value of support and special provisions.

    Once again, thank you for your support, consideration and vigilance."

    I consider this the Melanie Wilkes approach - remain sweetness and light to all no matter what sort of miserable idiots they may be, and always turn the situation around to see only the nice things.

    Turn it to everybody's advantage, especially your son's. And visualise them smacking themselves over the forehead when they rush to the files to check if the stuff really IS there!

  11. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Lillyth, Pain In the A.
  12. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Pookybear, I understand your frustration. Your son is really struggling. I agree, you have to find out how the test was given, first.
    I suspect you'll want a mtng anyway, but at least you'll have more info going in.
    Best of luck. None of this is easy.
  13. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Here's the thing, it's always better to put your request in writing, certified, because you have a chain to follow should you need it (and the school district has 10 days to respond). For me, I have been fortunate that a phone call does the trick.

    I would suggest you go and do some research before the meeting. Begin at www.ldonline.org They have tons of information on specific learning disabilities and particular accoms and mods that work. Do you actually have a specific(s) lds diagnosis by testing through the school?

    There are lots of things that we used for my difficult child's lang arts lds in elem school. Some of those can be a scribe for writing assignments - which would also include him dictating the answers to his homework to you (with your signature at the bottom). That makes homework go much quicker. I found my son much "freeer" to express himself when he wasn't bogged down with the mechanics of writing. It was amazing to see how much he had learned and absorbed when he felt no axiety about writing it down!

    Your son can also get his tests read aloud in a private or small group setting (this would also include any district or state required tests). In regards to spelling - he can also get modification regarding tests. For example, 10 words instead of 20, 5 words instead of 10, etc.

    He can also be released from spelling and grammer issues when papers are graded. He could give an oral report instead of a written one. He could also qualify for an electronic spelller (provided by the school) through supportive technology in his iep.

    Take your son's diagnosis (for example, written expression disorder, etc.) and do a google on accoms for that diagnosis and see what you come up with. There is a lot of great informatin on line that can help you once you get to the meeting.

    There are a lot of creative ways to work around these lds. Good luck.

  14. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    LDM-Thanks for the input but most of that is already in his IEP for accomodations. He's supposed to have stuff read to him, be in small groups, not have spelling count in other subjects, get shortened assignments, etc. So I am not real sure where to go after that. thanks for caring though!
  15. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    UPDATE: After spending time re-reading ds's IEP and crafting a letter to send to school (all of which took 2 hrs). I went to get the mail. In the mail was an envelope containing a note from his teacher. An Interim Report to Parents to be exact. Well, I had forgotten they will send me reviews because of the IEP.

    Anyway, it says:
    Good conduct/great attitude!! (The teacher put a smiley next to this!)
    Does not complete homework/class assignments
    Has great difficulty keeping up in class
    Assignments are incomplete
    Often inattentive in class
    Comments: Even with specific modifications in place DS has difficulty completeing all written work. Continued support is recommended. I would like to see more focus on written assignments as the work becomes more complex.

    UGGG!!! and DUHHH!!!! Of course he has great difficulty keeping up with work in class. He basically can't write and when he's concentrating on writing to complete an assignment he can't concentrate on anything else! Then he becomes so far behind that he's too frustrated to care. So of course he's inattentive.

    It made me so angry! Kinda didn't need to spend time writing the dumb letter now. I am just going to compose a short little note that says "Thanks. Let's revisit the IEP please".
    Anyone else have reading/writing/spelling issues that could suggest more options for the IEP? I think I have included all I can think of. I looked all through the internet and books back in April and May getting ready for the IEP and don't feel like doing it again.

    I don't drink-but I might start tonight!:(
  16. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    It sounds as if he needs direct instruction/remediation in reading/writing/spelling so he can get closer in ability to his peer group. Can you find out what reading program your SD uses for kids with specific learning disabilities in reading?
  17. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    I will make sure i find this out as I don't know the exact answere to this question. I emailed the teacher to call a review of the IEP. She called me back and set something up for Monday the 6th. We'll see what happens.