Just had another thought.... We have all been through so much anguish in this forum! We use our hearts striving to ease pain --- difficult child's, those in difficult child's orbit, our own. We use our heads striving to strategize for safety and sanity -- difficult child's, those in difficult child's orbit, our own. How phenomenal (and slippery/elusive at times) it is when we refreshingly and rejuvenatingly strive for nothing........that place where there is neither shame nor blame, we just accept....even if just for a moment. Peace of heart, peace of mind, peace of soul. Worth a mint, even if only for scattered moments. That place where radical place where love and boundaries co-exist peacefully. That radical place where we can just BE in peace. That Radical Place.... Radical Acceptance............Man, I really like that phrase! Thank you to whomever it was in this forum who introduced me to it!