I got a letter today with a return address from a nearby town, no name. I opened it and sat down to read two typewritten pages about how my daughter is a *****. Ok, I'll backtrack. Jumper is dating a REALLY nice boy, but he's 17 (she's 15). She has gone to his house several times because his father and stepfather wanted to meet her, but she would come back saying that they really won't talk to her. Stepmother rules the roost and J. is the only child there. In the letter, the SM writes that she found her son and Jumper kissing in her house. She was also critical of the fact that when her son comes to our house they are in Jumper's room (the door is always wide open...my rule). The reason they are in Jumper's room is because we HAVE no room. Our dogs are not that friendly to non-family members (yes, others would have put them down, but we won't) so there is only upstairs. Sonic's room is right next door and he's always in his room. This is a very small house and I am up and down the stairs all day, often stopping in to talk to the kids. I have seen them touching, but not inappropriately. I believe my daughter that nothing is going on beyond the kissing. I *do* believe they were kissing. I know this is rambling. The stepmother, who considers herself the mother, has sent me a set of rules (why do I always get rules? First from wayward son, now from J's stepmother...lol). One is that I have to drive Jumper to see her son every other weekend because she doesn't want to pay for his gasoline. He pays for his own gas (he works three jobs), but that's not the point. I'd be happy to drive her there to see him under their supervision, but they obviously don't like her and don't even know her and will never believe she isn't going to give them a grandchild. Yep, she wrote that she didn't want one. Hmmmmmm...guess what? I don't either and Jumper saw that and laughed and said, "She doesn't know how into sports I am and how I want to go to college and how I so DON'T want any baby." Jumper had tears in her eyes when I told her about the letter. I was calm and asked for information and I believe her. She felt terrible at how stepmother feels about her but doesn't want to stop dating J. because of stepmother's accusations. I feel like this is a hostile environment for her...bad juju...not good. I love J...he is almost 100% self-sufficient already and couldn't be nicer. He is a responsible straight A student and a star athlete. Jumper is only the second girl he has ever dated. I haven't been in this situation before. I'm not sure what to tell her. Part of me wants to keep her from seeing this boy again, even though I like him. Part of me doesn't know if I should get too involved. She already doesn't see him very much because he is always at work and lives in a town that is 45 minutes away. Jumper has no intention of breaking up with him, but her existence in this boy's life has caused him to have a worse relationship with his parents than he had before (and it was never good. J. will leave as soon as he turns eighteen). Since this is new to me, I'm not sure how to react. So far I have just hugged Jumper and told her I believed her and advised her to make plans today with some friends (which she is doing). I told hub and hub rolled his eyes...he said he'd take her out for ice cream (she is very close to her dad). What words of motherly wisdom do any of you have for me? Anything? If this were your daughter, would you make her break up with J. because of all the complications? Again, I have no doubt that there has not been any sex so I don't need/want advice or warning about that. Also, writing back is not going to happen. I have learned, from my saga with Scott, that writing letters is not a good idea...you can't have a conversation with a letter. Also, Jumper doesn't want us to talk to J's parents and feels that this would only make things worse for J. SM, by her letter, seems to have made up her mind about Jumper anyway, so nothing hub and I could say would probably make her feel better. Her whole intention of the letter was to convince me and hub that Jumper is a tramp and a very not-nice girl. I know better than to take up a losing argument.