The hits just keep coming...

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by PatriotsGirl, May 3, 2012.

  1. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Apparently, I am going to be a grandmother. She posted a picture of a ClearBlue pregnancy test showing positive. Then posted another post saying "omg". I have been trying to call and text her ever since. I haven't talked to her, but one of her friends posted "****, you are next" and she "liked" the comment.

    Lovely, my homeless, drug addict daughter is going to bring another life into this world when she cannot even take care of herself. I know she won't consider not having it since she is sooo in love with A hole....and A hole is still living with the other young girl.

    I think I am going to be sick.
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    OH honey... Oh no... Sweetie... I don't have any wisdom at all, just lots and lots of hugs for you...
  3. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    PG, I'm so very sorry! There are no words...
  4. vligrl

    vligrl New Member

    Oh boy. Talk about a mixed bag of feelings. One hand you are going to be a grandmother which ordinarily would be incredible news, but on the other.....this baby was conceived while your daughter was/is on drugs? Any chance she would think this event would be important enough to quit? Feel for you big time.
  5. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Getting pregnant with her was what straightened me out. I could only hope that at least that would come out of this....but all I can think of is the health problems that baby is going to most likely have... :(
  6. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I talked to her. She doesn't know what she is going to do, yet. She said the first step is to go to the doctor and confirm it. She said she gave A hole an ultimatum last night of her or the girlfriend and he told her that if she was giving him an ultimatum not to let the door hit her on the butt. He doesn't know about the baby, yet, unless he checks her Facebook. She asked me not to tell him anything. She said if he doesn't want to be with her without knowing about the baby, that she didn't want to be with him just because of the baby. Good to know she is thinking semi-reasonable. So, that is it for now. Clearblue says she is, she is going to get it confirmed and then think about what she is going to do. I am just still in disbelief. I have always wanted grandchildren one day, but not like this...
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    PG I have been where you are now. Last September we found out difficult child was pregnant when I found a pregnancy test kit sticking out of her purse. Our collective (mine, husband's and easy child's) hearts sank about as low as they could get. We knew there was no way she could take care of a baby and she was actively using drugs and drinking at the time, had no job and was living in a sober house. She said she was going to keep the baby and we could not talk any sense into her. She left in a huff and we spent the next month praying that she would come to her senses.

    We had no contact with her during the next month and finally she came over and confessed she finally realized she could not parent a baby and couldn't even take care of herself and asked if we would help her. I don't mean to suggest this is right for anyone else but for us it was the only choice that made sense. She went to planned parenthood and made the arrangements and we took her there a few days later. The best part was that we paid for her to get a five year IUD so that she would not put herself and another innocent baby in this position again.

    I was glad she came to the decision herslef and I get chills when I think of the ramifications if she had gone through with the pregnancy. The drugs, alcohol and inherited traits from her, the addict birthfather, and her birthparents was too much to even comprehend.

    If you need someone to talk to who has been through this feel free to pm me.

    I will be thinking of you and I send supportive and caring hugs.

  8. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    I am so sorry...
  9. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Oh PG I am so sorry... gosh what we go through together on this list.... we are here for you.

    My hope is that her situation will somehow be a wake up call for her.... both to get rid of the jerk of a boyfriend, but also what drugs will do to that baby.....

    And please do something nice for yourself. How I wish we all lived near each other so we could just go out for a night out!!

  10. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Whatever happens, I hope she starts taking herself seriously and reflects on how her choices impact other people. I pray she gets her life together now. Many, many hugs.
  11. Oh boy. PG I hate to have to say I am sorry to hear that. It's supposed to be a happy, joyous time. It is good to see she gave the so-called boyfriend an ultimatum. Maybe this will straighten her out and she will get her act together. We can pray for that, at least.
  12. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    I do have one thing to mention here... If she doesn't want him to know about it, she needs to get it OFF facebook. And... I'm praying and pretzeling and rattling that she makes the right decision. Period.
  13. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    been there done that. I know the fear, the anger and all the other emotions. When I say I am sorry...I am truly sorry. Hugs DDD
  14. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Oh PG I am so so sorry. That's my biggest nightmare and I know it's 200x worse when it's your daughter.

    Do you have a trusted OB/GYN or GP you can call? I am not sure if you are looking for support or advice or I don't mean to overstep. If it were my daughter; I would call my dr and an interventionist and arrange to take her to the dr to confirm the pg, have the dr scare the heck out of her regarding drugs and pregnancy and then do an intervention on the spot. I don't know if that's even possible-but I think it could be your best shot. And maybe you can let the dr know that she will likely flip her top and and you'd like to consider a psychiatric hold if she does. Maybe an interventionist or facility can suggest a dr who would be helpful if your family doctor is not.

    Please know we are here for you and I care. Let me know if I can help. I will support you 100%
  15. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I also know how you are feeling right now. I went about bonkers when I found out I was pregnant and I wasnt thrilled when I found out Cory was going to be a father both times. Of course, me getting pregnant turned me around and it seems to have settled Cory down some.
  16. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    (((Hugs))) So easy to say 'detach', but so impossible to do.
  17. It happened to my difficult child and we rejoiced in the babies, identical twins , and have been enjoying them ever since. They are nothing like the parents. They are pure joy!
  18. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    My 60yo friend owns her business and her druggie difficult child son and druggie difficult child girlfriend dropped off the 2yo and 4yo and left town. I just don't think I have it in me to raise toddlers again, but like she said, the alternative (foster care) scared her to death.

    We all worry about this problem with our difficult children because we know they are not ready to be parents.

    My 2 nephews were dating gfs only about 2 months when they both became pregnant. Both gfs wanted to get married, one already had a 9 month old baby so she should know where they come from lol!!! Both are struggling financially after 2 years.

    Not to be insensitive BUT do you think it maybe possible that this is her way of forcing him to stay with her?? I really don't think he is going to be much help if she decides to keep the baby.

    Prayers for her to make a decision that is good for all!!
  19. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    PG, biggest cyber HUG I can give. I know how stressed you have been lately and now this ...
  20. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry, PG.