Ok, hi all. I have a 13 year old girl with poss. ODD (very likely I think) and poss Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). Am waiting to talk to dr. As you guys probably know its difficult dealing with tantrums etc. can I tell u about a tantrum the other night and you help me out with advice about if I dealt with it the right way. Daughter was shouting at sister over the tv prog we were watching, so I asked her to stop. Then warned her she would have to go upstairs if she continued, which she did. Because I wouldn't let her back down, after threatening to kill the kitten (which she would never do) she threw some clothes down the stairs that had been hanging up airing. I asked her to pick them up a few times then said (all done very calmly) if I come up and pick them up, I tip stuff out in your room, pick them up please. So the tipping up of stuff started. She threw the clothes I tipped out a drawer in her room. Eventually she had enough and started shouting at me for other things. This continued till gone eleven when her sister was trying to sleep. In the end I had to end it the only way it can be ended at that point was by getting aggressive. I don't hit her just get in her face. There are so many things she does that I ignore, choose my battles, that once I've asked her to do something, I can't back down. I know once she is tantrumming she is very unlikely to cooperate with me but should I have just left that or was I right to make a stand. I know some of you will say I shouldn't of got aggressive with her but I'm not perfect, just doing my best, it's been a long hard summer.