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Parent Emeritus
The value of honesty
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 668339" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>In thinking about this some more, and in talking with my sister this morning about the ongoing challenge of my dad, who is more and more difficult in his old age (83)...I think it's more disturbing to me that a seemingly well-adjusted person would feel the need to embellish, exaggerate, fudge, white-lie...whatever you want to call it...on an ongoing basis than it was when my Difficult Child would lie about whether the sun was out or not. That is part of addiction, and I could understand that.</p><p></p><p>With people like my dad, all I can figure is that he is so insecure that the truth just isn't enough. He truly lives in a fantasy world where his nieces and nephews (people in their mid 60s now) are super accomplished and super successful and because they drive a Mercedes they are...good. No, great. </p><p></p><p>It is so easy to see right through him and it's so sad to think that this is how he views the world.</p><p></p><p>He honestly cannot deal with the truth.</p><p></p><p>At my son's wedding, when longtime relatives were here, it came out that a recently deceased niece had been a "horrible alcoholic." (her brother's words, not mine). My mom told my dad this, and he truly could not assimilate this information and got mad about it.</p><p></p><p>He cannot handle the truth about himself or anybody else.</p><p></p><p>Now, that is sad right there. It has made me doubt everything he says, and in fact, it makes me suspect of his character. What kind of person has to have everybody perfect around them, and cannot ever be questioned with the simplest of questions (if you do he get furious) and embellishes virtually everything he says? </p><p></p><p>Anyway, I'm glad I live 10 hours from him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 668339, member: 17542"] In thinking about this some more, and in talking with my sister this morning about the ongoing challenge of my dad, who is more and more difficult in his old age (83)...I think it's more disturbing to me that a seemingly well-adjusted person would feel the need to embellish, exaggerate, fudge, white-lie...whatever you want to call it...on an ongoing basis than it was when my Difficult Child would lie about whether the sun was out or not. That is part of addiction, and I could understand that. With people like my dad, all I can figure is that he is so insecure that the truth just isn't enough. He truly lives in a fantasy world where his nieces and nephews (people in their mid 60s now) are super accomplished and super successful and because they drive a Mercedes they are...good. No, great. It is so easy to see right through him and it's so sad to think that this is how he views the world. He honestly cannot deal with the truth. At my son's wedding, when longtime relatives were here, it came out that a recently deceased niece had been a "horrible alcoholic." (her brother's words, not mine). My mom told my dad this, and he truly could not assimilate this information and got mad about it. He cannot handle the truth about himself or anybody else. Now, that is sad right there. It has made me doubt everything he says, and in fact, it makes me suspect of his character. What kind of person has to have everybody perfect around them, and cannot ever be questioned with the simplest of questions (if you do he get furious) and embellishes virtually everything he says? Anyway, I'm glad I live 10 hours from him. [/QUOTE]
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