Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
Family of Origin
The win and the loss
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 676605" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Yes. This is true of my mother (and of my sister). It is a two-pronged thing, Copa. We were raised to believe we were not entitled because they were. They wanted to be the source of largesse. Like God. That is power-over. It didn't matter whether it was a diamond bracelet or a carton of ice cream.</p><p></p><p>That is something we need to take a look at too, in our healing.</p><p></p><p>That we have been brought up to defer, to allow someone else not only access to, but distribution rights, to our power; to our energies; to our thinking and whatever our talents are.</p><p></p><p>Think about it.</p><p></p><p>That is what it comes down to.</p><p></p><p>The only thing we could do freely was love our children. That Sleeping Beauty kiss we never once saw coming and cherished with a sincerity of gratitude that is with us still, today. That was the only thing they did not sully with their contemptuous little brains and their power over reaching and stealing and wasting. </p><p></p><p>Think about the way the mothers handled the blossoming young daughter as she came into the power of her womanhood.</p><p></p><p>Not well, Copa.</p><p></p><p>Not well.</p><p></p><p>If they could have taken that from us too, they would have.</p><p></p><p>So, we have come through our lives feeling less entitled than the other guy. Than any other guy. In our work, in our everything. Maybe, what others call boundary issues are even more devastating, to us. That is probably why we do better on our own and behind the scenes.</p><p></p><p>We will work on that.</p><p></p><p>Why else would we say we are sorry and always want to fix everything all the time and never take credit for anything.</p><p></p><p>I am going to get so healthy my mother and my sister will not even recognize me.</p><p></p><p>Good.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p>So, Copa. I was thinking about that other person you worked with, the one who said you had no boundaries. Here is the thing: Why would he not have helped you develop them instead of condemning you for not (in his gaudy godliness of his opinionated self) possessing them?</p><p></p><p>Because he was a bad and useless person, that's why.</p><p></p><p>He saw a vulnerability and used that gift of empathy to hurt someone.</p><p></p><p>Is that not an apt description of a sociopath, or worse?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 676605, member: 17461"] Yes. This is true of my mother (and of my sister). It is a two-pronged thing, Copa. We were raised to believe we were not entitled because they were. They wanted to be the source of largesse. Like God. That is power-over. It didn't matter whether it was a diamond bracelet or a carton of ice cream. That is something we need to take a look at too, in our healing. That we have been brought up to defer, to allow someone else not only access to, but distribution rights, to our power; to our energies; to our thinking and whatever our talents are. Think about it. That is what it comes down to. The only thing we could do freely was love our children. That Sleeping Beauty kiss we never once saw coming and cherished with a sincerity of gratitude that is with us still, today. That was the only thing they did not sully with their contemptuous little brains and their power over reaching and stealing and wasting. Think about the way the mothers handled the blossoming young daughter as she came into the power of her womanhood. Not well, Copa. Not well. If they could have taken that from us too, they would have. So, we have come through our lives feeling less entitled than the other guy. Than any other guy. In our work, in our everything. Maybe, what others call boundary issues are even more devastating, to us. That is probably why we do better on our own and behind the scenes. We will work on that. Why else would we say we are sorry and always want to fix everything all the time and never take credit for anything. I am going to get so healthy my mother and my sister will not even recognize me. Good. Cedar So, Copa. I was thinking about that other person you worked with, the one who said you had no boundaries. Here is the thing: Why would he not have helped you develop them instead of condemning you for not (in his gaudy godliness of his opinionated self) possessing them? Because he was a bad and useless person, that's why. He saw a vulnerability and used that gift of empathy to hurt someone. Is that not an apt description of a sociopath, or worse? [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
Family of Origin
The win and the loss
Top