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Therapeutic Boarding School?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 12336" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Susan,</p><p></p><p>My daughter is 15 1/2. She is also adopted. Up until last year she was sneaking out of the house, hanging with her gangsta friends, going to bonfires, drinking and experimenting with drugs. She was cutting school, flunking her classes, hanging around our skate park all hours refusing to come home, running away from home and completely disrespectful to us. I was so close to looking for alternative living arrangements because nothing we were doing was working. My husband just about gave up and decided she was going to end up on the street.</p><p></p><p>I couldn't give up, and I couldn't send her away either. I finally convinced my husband that we had to involve the police and hold her responsible for her behavior. We began calling them when she ran away or wouldn't come home. I drove to houses where she was at with other kids drinking and called the police on them all. She had charges filed on her several times and finally was sent downtown on charges of stealing alcohol and drinking it from a friend's home and snorting adderall. None of the other parents would file charges on their child. But we were lucky, our juvenile officers were wonderful and they knew we were trying to help her and they wanted her to get help too. </p><p></p><p>When she appeared in court to answer the charges last May she was sent to juvenile detention for the weekend. That was the one thing that scared the heck out of her. We live in a middle class neighborhood and she has all the comforts that most teens would love. She was totally unprepared to have her freedom taken away along with all her possessions and to see what kind of people are in detention and what she would end up like if she continued.</p><p></p><p>She just wrote an essay for her English class that described how her life was out of control and how she decided to change it when she had gotten into a great deal of trouble. It made me cry.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child just got her temporary driver's license last week, an event we didnt think would ever happen. She is getting good grades and has a whole different group of friends. For almost 15 years I don't think she ever considered herself a real part of our family. In her essay she said that she decided to become part of her family again, and for the first time in her life I believe she really felt part of that family.</p><p></p><p>I don't know if it will work for you but if you live in an area where you think the police will help you, you may want to go and talk to the juvenile detective and see what they can do to help. We were lucky, they saw the potential in her and they went over and beyond what they had to to get her help. The hardest thingwe ever had to do was call the police on our child, and we realized it could have backfired, but we had nowhere else to turn.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can find some help for your son too. I knew if we had to send her away that she would just be convinced that she wasn't good enough for anyone to keep, ever.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 12336, member: 59"] Susan, My daughter is 15 1/2. She is also adopted. Up until last year she was sneaking out of the house, hanging with her gangsta friends, going to bonfires, drinking and experimenting with drugs. She was cutting school, flunking her classes, hanging around our skate park all hours refusing to come home, running away from home and completely disrespectful to us. I was so close to looking for alternative living arrangements because nothing we were doing was working. My husband just about gave up and decided she was going to end up on the street. I couldn't give up, and I couldn't send her away either. I finally convinced my husband that we had to involve the police and hold her responsible for her behavior. We began calling them when she ran away or wouldn't come home. I drove to houses where she was at with other kids drinking and called the police on them all. She had charges filed on her several times and finally was sent downtown on charges of stealing alcohol and drinking it from a friend's home and snorting adderall. None of the other parents would file charges on their child. But we were lucky, our juvenile officers were wonderful and they knew we were trying to help her and they wanted her to get help too. When she appeared in court to answer the charges last May she was sent to juvenile detention for the weekend. That was the one thing that scared the heck out of her. We live in a middle class neighborhood and she has all the comforts that most teens would love. She was totally unprepared to have her freedom taken away along with all her possessions and to see what kind of people are in detention and what she would end up like if she continued. She just wrote an essay for her English class that described how her life was out of control and how she decided to change it when she had gotten into a great deal of trouble. It made me cry. My difficult child just got her temporary driver's license last week, an event we didnt think would ever happen. She is getting good grades and has a whole different group of friends. For almost 15 years I don't think she ever considered herself a real part of our family. In her essay she said that she decided to become part of her family again, and for the first time in her life I believe she really felt part of that family. I don't know if it will work for you but if you live in an area where you think the police will help you, you may want to go and talk to the juvenile detective and see what they can do to help. We were lucky, they saw the potential in her and they went over and beyond what they had to to get her help. The hardest thingwe ever had to do was call the police on our child, and we realized it could have backfired, but we had nowhere else to turn. I hope you can find some help for your son too. I knew if we had to send her away that she would just be convinced that she wasn't good enough for anyone to keep, ever. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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