Last weekend I asked easy child to put away clean dishes (dishwasher and rack). Needless to say she did not. I called her and she was on her way to a friend's house to go swimming. She had left her vehicle in town and carpooling to the lake so could not get back into town when I called. I was FURIOUS. I told difficult child to take her t.v. and computer and anything else she uses out of her room. She arrive home late and everyone was in bed. Her stuff was in my room. She comes in and picks up the computer - I blocked her way and said, "The computer stays until the dishes are put away."
"I am going to put the computer in my room, go to the bathroom, and then put the dishes away." "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "It is my computer" "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "Why did you take this cell phone? It doesn't even work." (this sentence is cleaned up for sensitive ears. "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "Dad!!!!!!"
husband: "You two leave - I'm trying to sleep"
Me: "NO, you are to help me with this! The computer stays until the dishes are done"
husband gets up and closes the windows lest the neighbors hear. "You two get out of here."
Me: "No, you are to help me with this! The computer stays until the dishes are done"
husband: "easy child, leave the computer."
easy child: "No, It is mine"
Me: "The computer stays until the dishes are done" (everytime saying this in a low calm voice - I was not going to change the subject for anything.)
easy child: "Dad!!!! Tell her to let me have my computer. It is mine."
husband: "easy child, leave the computer."
Me: "The computer stays until the dishes are done."
For the most part, that is all I would say. Just stood there and saying, "The computer stays until the dishes are done" each time she came up with an argument.
I take the computer from her. She actually goes and puts all the dishes away. She comes back to get her computer and says, "You have to put my t.v. away - it is a pain to set up." Me: "You know where the t.v. is when you are ready for it."
So, husband is starting to see that he needs to stand with me when he is in the room. Staying out of the issue just sends easy child the message that he supports her (if someone isn't against me than they are for me).
Then, a month ago when I signed difficult child up for baseball, husband says, "Why are we spending money on that. difficult child doesn't know anything about baseball." husband has practiced catching and went to yesterday's practice and tonight's game. Earlier this week he told me that difficult child is bad at baseball. Tonight he acknowledged and told difficult child that he played well during tonight's game.
So, husband is realizing that even though difficult child is probably the only boy who has never played tee or toss or any baseball at all, he is fitting in well with the other boys and is doing very well.
Yes, he is rough around the edges, but he has enough good plays to show potential.
"I am going to put the computer in my room, go to the bathroom, and then put the dishes away." "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "It is my computer" "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "Why did you take this cell phone? It doesn't even work." (this sentence is cleaned up for sensitive ears. "The computer stays until the dishes are done." "Dad!!!!!!"
husband: "You two leave - I'm trying to sleep"
Me: "NO, you are to help me with this! The computer stays until the dishes are done"
husband gets up and closes the windows lest the neighbors hear. "You two get out of here."
Me: "No, you are to help me with this! The computer stays until the dishes are done"
husband: "easy child, leave the computer."
easy child: "No, It is mine"
Me: "The computer stays until the dishes are done" (everytime saying this in a low calm voice - I was not going to change the subject for anything.)
easy child: "Dad!!!! Tell her to let me have my computer. It is mine."
husband: "easy child, leave the computer."
Me: "The computer stays until the dishes are done."
For the most part, that is all I would say. Just stood there and saying, "The computer stays until the dishes are done" each time she came up with an argument.
I take the computer from her. She actually goes and puts all the dishes away. She comes back to get her computer and says, "You have to put my t.v. away - it is a pain to set up." Me: "You know where the t.v. is when you are ready for it."
So, husband is starting to see that he needs to stand with me when he is in the room. Staying out of the issue just sends easy child the message that he supports her (if someone isn't against me than they are for me).
Then, a month ago when I signed difficult child up for baseball, husband says, "Why are we spending money on that. difficult child doesn't know anything about baseball." husband has practiced catching and went to yesterday's practice and tonight's game. Earlier this week he told me that difficult child is bad at baseball. Tonight he acknowledged and told difficult child that he played well during tonight's game.
So, husband is realizing that even though difficult child is probably the only boy who has never played tee or toss or any baseball at all, he is fitting in well with the other boys and is doing very well.
Yes, he is rough around the edges, but he has enough good plays to show potential.
Glad to hear husband is seeing the error of his ways!
