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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
They don't get what they put us through....
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 687195" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>I do know that what he was saying yesterday was manipulative and just trying to get what he wants. I also know he has been through a lot, probably more than I can imagine. And I know that at times he feels bad about what he has put us through, but I think he thinks about the financial cost rather than the emotional cost for us. I also know that he knows we love him.... But I just don't think he understands the nature of our love for him. For that matter I don't think my daughter really understands it either..... And I am not sure I did until I became a parent. I just think the love you feel for a child is very different than the love you feel for others.</p><p></p><p>And yes Nancy he has many demons and often just wants to numb the pain. I am not sure at this point that he is using. Yesterday he was upset because he was trying to buy a coffee at Starbucks.</p><p></p><p>RN I have been going through this for a very long time...10 plus years. I am no longer totally obsessed with it or even think about it all the time. I did that believe me....but his comments yesterday did get me thinking. Mostly thinking about how would I handle it if we became totally estranged like my dad and brother were. What he doesn't really understand is that I realized today that if that happened I could live with it......my main concern is not that we have contact but that he is ok.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 687195, member: 15801"] I do know that what he was saying yesterday was manipulative and just trying to get what he wants. I also know he has been through a lot, probably more than I can imagine. And I know that at times he feels bad about what he has put us through, but I think he thinks about the financial cost rather than the emotional cost for us. I also know that he knows we love him.... But I just don't think he understands the nature of our love for him. For that matter I don't think my daughter really understands it either..... And I am not sure I did until I became a parent. I just think the love you feel for a child is very different than the love you feel for others. And yes Nancy he has many demons and often just wants to numb the pain. I am not sure at this point that he is using. Yesterday he was upset because he was trying to buy a coffee at Starbucks. RN I have been going through this for a very long time...10 plus years. I am no longer totally obsessed with it or even think about it all the time. I did that believe me....but his comments yesterday did get me thinking. Mostly thinking about how would I handle it if we became totally estranged like my dad and brother were. What he doesn't really understand is that I realized today that if that happened I could live with it......my main concern is not that we have contact but that he is ok. [/QUOTE]
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They don't get what they put us through....
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