Things are deteriorating rapidly

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by flutterby, Feb 23, 2010.

  1. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    Another horrible night last night.

    difficult child had been fine, took her medications, and went to bed, prepared to go to school today. One of the cats woke her up at 2:30am and it was downhill from there.

    I was up with her until 5am, with her sobbing and catastrophizing, saying she can't live like this anymore. In the back of my mind the entire time was the question, at what point can I say that I am no longer able to give her the help she needs at home and put her in the hospital for a short (30 days?) stay.

    difficult child decided that she would go to school today and if she could leave after 6th period. That's a little more than half a school day. Partial days is something I have mentioned to her in the past. I agreed. Then she obsessed on what if they don't let her go home and I had to reassure her repeatedly that they would. I sent a note this morning saying she would be leaving immediately following 6th period in case I couldn't get in touch with the people I needed to.

    I contacted the SpEd Director for the high school this morning. Explained the situation, repeatedly stressing how urgent the situation is. I understand that those that don't live with another with a mental illness don't get it, but they seem to think if she was ok 2 months ago, why isn't she ok now?

    Anyway, I lucked out in that SpEd Director is not available this week for an IEP meeting because federal auditors are in all week. So, I got her to agree to partial days through Friday at least, and then we'll have an IEP meeting Monday afternoon. I did stress that this is only a temporary situation until difficult child is able to find stability and use her tools so that she can maintain, but that right now she needs all the support she can get.
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I'm so sorry. I know how helpless a feeling it is to be the mom and watch your child deteriorate before your very eyes.

    What's going on with the medications? Have you been in touch with her psychiatrist? Is there any chance of getting her into a day treatment program? That might actually be less stressful for both of you.
  3. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    I just left a message with the psychiatrist about Zoloft not agreeing with difficult child and gave them a synopsis of difficult child's mental state. psychiatrist is with a patient right now, but they said they will have her call me.

    They do offer inpatient services there, but I'm not sure about day treatment.

    When I asked difficult child last night what she thought about going to the hospital, she said she didn't want to be some "test subject". It's not funny given the situation, but it kinda is. I explained it's a hospital, just like a hospital for people who are physically ill only for people who have mental illness. She didn't go off the deep end, but it's probably because I presented it as a, what do you think about this, scenario.
  4. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Flutter, I am so sorry. I too wonder if you have got a hold of psychiatrist about medications. If this continues, hospitalization sounds like a viable option. I hope she makes it to 6th period. I will be very impressed if she does.

    I hate how most people just do not get mental illness. If they cannot physically see it, then it is not there.

  5. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    You posted after I did. I hope psychiatrist gets back to you soon, and glad difficult child did not go off the deep end about hospitalization. Maybe if you told her there they could keep a better eye on her and how she was reacting to the medications? Don't know if that would help or make things worse.
  6. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    I explained that they would be able to see her in different settings and reacting to different triggers and it would help them figure out which medication might be the most helpful.
  7. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Yow. Honestly Heather? She sounds JUST LIKE ME when I was on Zoloft. I seriously hope the psychiatrist helps here. This is scary for her and you. HUGS!!!!
  8. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Hope she makes it through her day without too much trouble. Sending hugs, prayers for difficult child, and strangth for you.
  9. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    No more advice, just a hug.
  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Sending a hug. A bunch of them for each of you. This just is such a hard thing to live with.

    You may want to wait to speak about the hospital. What would happen if she refused to go and you think she really needs to? Do you think you could get her there anyway? Would it be better to just let her knwo about it as a fact "we are going to the hospital today" rather than to let her think about it and catastrophize it until she just cannot do it with-o a huge trauma for both of you? It is just a suggestion because I don't know what would work best with her. It was hard enough to figure it out with Wiz. We didn't tell him until he was in the car with the doors childproofed and we were on the highway. We were afraid he would run away. But I don't know if that would make your daughter worse or not.

    Anyway, I am sorry she is so sick. It really IS a miserable way to live. For all of you.
  11. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    How did she do? How are the both of you doing?
    No other advice more than what the others have given. Just support
  12. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Just wondering how the day went???
  13. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    She made it through 6th period. psychiatrist called back. She responds, "Ahhhhh. Ok," to everything. So, even when I asked at what point do we decided that this is more than can be managed at home and she needs to be hospitalized, I got, "Ahhh. Ok." *throws hands up in the air*

    She said to stop the Zoloft. Already done. And increase the Trazodone to 100mg, as 50mg wasn't working for sleep. Already done. We already have an appointment next Thursday.