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Things are tough
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 704825" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>I think only we know what is best for us. Only we know what we can handle happening in our own home. Only we know what we choose to live with or not live with.</p><p></p><p>My son cannot come home because I know if he did, he would morph right back into the same type of behavior he was doing when he was in our home. He did not respect our home and he did not respect us. He could not control this when he was NOT sober but it was his choice to be "NOT sober". He did not appreciate what he had. We have not given him a chance to come back once he was out. Will we ever? I don't know the answer to that and I don't have to know that answer right now. That is okay.</p><p></p><p>When my son was doing all of that I felt so much shame, despair and so much helplessness. I do not want to live like that. I do not want my son on the street either and for us we have found a happy medium. We won't let this situation go on forever but for now, we are content. He is content but I feel that being away from us which is not what he desires will cause him to make changes that he needs to make. If that does not happen within a reasonable amount of time, we will reasses our situation.</p><p></p><p>Just because you are doing something one way now doesn't mean you can't change it and do it another way as time goes on.</p><p></p><p>I don't think there is any right or wrong answer. We all do what we need to do. There is no one size fit all solution here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 704825, member: 15032"] I think only we know what is best for us. Only we know what we can handle happening in our own home. Only we know what we choose to live with or not live with. My son cannot come home because I know if he did, he would morph right back into the same type of behavior he was doing when he was in our home. He did not respect our home and he did not respect us. He could not control this when he was NOT sober but it was his choice to be "NOT sober". He did not appreciate what he had. We have not given him a chance to come back once he was out. Will we ever? I don't know the answer to that and I don't have to know that answer right now. That is okay. When my son was doing all of that I felt so much shame, despair and so much helplessness. I do not want to live like that. I do not want my son on the street either and for us we have found a happy medium. We won't let this situation go on forever but for now, we are content. He is content but I feel that being away from us which is not what he desires will cause him to make changes that he needs to make. If that does not happen within a reasonable amount of time, we will reasses our situation. Just because you are doing something one way now doesn't mean you can't change it and do it another way as time goes on. I don't think there is any right or wrong answer. We all do what we need to do. There is no one size fit all solution here. [/QUOTE]
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