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This court battle is making him sick
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<blockquote data-quote="Kalahou" data-source="post: 724565" data-attributes="member: 19617"><p>SWOT,</p><p>So sorry to hear this. How it can drain you so. I relate so well since my Difficult Child son had marital problems (granted, many exacerbated by his Difficult Child issues) and it led to divorce. (The ex-wife was not so nice and quite vindictive to him, which in turn spurred my son go down more quickly.) Son also had no one else to talk to but me. I felt the same way as you are stating here -- I didn’t know if he was just venting or fishing for advice from me on how to handle it. And all the while he was having his own issues to. Wife was demanding everything. But son stood his ground for 50-50 legal custody at least. That was the one thing he wanted to keep, since he was losing most everything else about the kids. </p><p></p><p>My son is not in a place to be able to care for or support his kids at all (he can barely support himself), and he knows it. He sees his 2 kids now and then for a day, when they stay with me two weekends a month. They are always glad to be together and he understands he is not is a position to do more with them. But the 50-50 legal custody is the one thing he holds on to.</p><p></p><p>I do hope it works out for Bart. I believe the emotional issues do take a real toll physiologically on a persons health. But I know you dread to hear of his problems with the ex and asking you how to handle it - ugh ugh. Don't let it get you down too bad. It is just so hard when we feel that we are their only support. ( I still feel this now.) And like you, I wish I had a way out. All the detachment learning here is helping me to stay out of the marital and ex marital battles also.</p><p></p><p>Take care. Vent all you want. We understand and stick with you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kalahou, post: 724565, member: 19617"] SWOT, So sorry to hear this. How it can drain you so. I relate so well since my Difficult Child son had marital problems (granted, many exacerbated by his Difficult Child issues) and it led to divorce. (The ex-wife was not so nice and quite vindictive to him, which in turn spurred my son go down more quickly.) Son also had no one else to talk to but me. I felt the same way as you are stating here -- I didn’t know if he was just venting or fishing for advice from me on how to handle it. And all the while he was having his own issues to. Wife was demanding everything. But son stood his ground for 50-50 legal custody at least. That was the one thing he wanted to keep, since he was losing most everything else about the kids. My son is not in a place to be able to care for or support his kids at all (he can barely support himself), and he knows it. He sees his 2 kids now and then for a day, when they stay with me two weekends a month. They are always glad to be together and he understands he is not is a position to do more with them. But the 50-50 legal custody is the one thing he holds on to. I do hope it works out for Bart. I believe the emotional issues do take a real toll physiologically on a persons health. But I know you dread to hear of his problems with the ex and asking you how to handle it - ugh ugh. Don't let it get you down too bad. It is just so hard when we feel that we are their only support. ( I still feel this now.) And like you, I wish I had a way out. All the detachment learning here is helping me to stay out of the marital and ex marital battles also. Take care. Vent all you want. We understand and stick with you. [/QUOTE]
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This court battle is making him sick
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