This was proud mama day for me

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by SuZir, Sep 27, 2013.

  1. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    You know those moments, when it feels like you maybe haven't done everything wrong in parenting? I'm totally dumbstruck, but can't deny it. Today both of my kids caused me that kind of moment. And separately. Probably first time ever. Not sure if I will ever recover from the shock. :highvoltage:

    First easy child came home with his report card from first term. Really nice grades despite missing over one third of the classes. And more importantly, achieved all by himself. I have done absolutely nothing, save asking him few times, how he likes his classes and are there any issues. He scheduled his work himself (and being so much away, that can be a challenge), stuck to it and came through with flying colours. No nagging, no helping to organize, nothing.

    He has always done well at school, but changing schools and sports keeping him out from classes so much caused him some struggles. Especially when we decided to teach him to manage it himself. He was getting a handle of it already last spring, but then he still needed my help to map things out. Now he did all that all by himself. There is less and less little in my littlest boy every day *proud* *sniff*

    Of course easy child making me proud is nothing new, and difficult child manages to do so also from time to time. But it really isn't common, that he would manage to choose the same day his baby brother. However he did now. He called me to chat and have a sounding board. He is worried about his flat (and team) mate. He is struggling both on the field, being part of the team and living abroad so far from home. Not understanding the language and different culture are really getting to him. And changing from playing against boys in college to playing against men in pro league has been a bigger step than he had anticipated too. difficult child has tried to cheer him up, told about what he learned during his last year's sophomore slump, shared the advices his sport psychiatric has given him and what not.

    difficult child called me mainly to have someone listen his worries about his flat mate's situation and partly to sound out his ideas how to try to support him. It's of course unfortunate his friend is having such a tough time. I deeply sympathize. And there isn't much difficult child can do to help. But I'm very proud of difficult child actually taking time to notice his flat mate is having tough time (and not only at the field, that difficult child of course notices), understanding that flat mate being difficult at times is because of him having tough time, sympathizing and actually having courage to try and take action to help. That is really a biggie for my boy. He really is showing some growth here. It is unlikely he can do much to help his friend, but just trying is something I haven't often seen in him.
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2013
  2. dstc_99

    dstc_99 Well-Known Member

    Standing ovation!
  3. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    May you have many more of these shocks!
  4. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That's what having a warrior mom can do!!!!! Glad both the boys are doing well. Great post.

  5. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Funny thing is: If these two happenings would had been other way around, I wouldn't had thought a thing about it. When my easy child is being a good friend and shows some social skills and awareness of other people and their feelings, I always take it granted. Now and then I remember to be thankful he has come after his father with that, but mostly I just assume that of course he is doing all that.

    But, and this especially is the one, I never notice, when difficult child is independent, driven and self starter with things like school (or sport.) I just don't really take a notice either. I just assume, that of course he is going to do that. With him and school, I always put all my energy to negatives (and there were many) and kind of skipped noticing, that kiddie not only did learn, he certainly was independent and self starter with the actual school work. Same is true with his sport, and considering that is his employment... Well, that is not a small thing.

    That gives some food for thought. Maybe I should stop and appreciate, and remember to also show my appreciation, the strengths my kids do have. You know, they both do have lots of those too.
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Savor the day. If all goes as you hope...there will be plenty more! Hugs DDD