This weeks update

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by needprayers, Sep 8, 2010.

  1. needprayers

    needprayers Guest

    This weeks update.

    difficult child has been on 25mg zoloft for almost a week now. We are supposed to up it to 50mg after two weeks, depending on how he is reacting to it. I know its early, but he does seem to have is spirits lifted some, and when he gets angry/mad, he doesen't stay that way nearly as long. We were up front with him and told him that the medicine was supposed to get him out of his "funk" and help him to get over his sadness/bad moods.

    We met with the Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) for the fourth time yesterday. He actually almost smiled in the meeting. Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) said keep doing what we are doing. Reward him for good behaviour, punish hime for bad behaviour (not physically), and keep it consistant between us. I need to work on being "less dictatorship" and the wife needs to work on being "more strict".

    Someone mentioned difficult child may be on the high end of the autism spectrum. I don't know, but to me, he doesn't really show any of the Autism symptoms. He loves playing with other kids that he knows. He doesn't have many "close" friends though. He doesn't have any repetitive "quirks". When he was younger he wouldn't seem to look any adult in the eye, but he doesn't have a problem with it now.

    About the only thing he is obsessed with, is his play station. He had it all weekend, and really didn't play it as much as he usually does. It was a beautiful weekend, so he spent a lot of it outside.

    When I read the different symptoms of ODD, it nails him to a "T".

    * Negativity - Very Common
    * Defiance - Very Common
    * Disobedience - Very Common
    * Hostility directed toward authority figures - Not so much hostility, just defiance
    * Temper tantrums - Never
    * Argumentativeness with adults - Very Common, but almost always complies after arguing
    * Refusal to comply with adult requests or rules - Sometimes
    * Deliberate annoyance of other people - Very Common
    * Blaming others for mistakes or misbehavior - Very Common
    * Acting touchy and easily annoyed - Rarely "touchy" but he is very easily annoyed
    * Anger and resentment - Very Common
    * Spiteful or vindictive behavior - Uncommon
    * Aggressiveness toward peers - Never
    * Difficulty maintaining friendships - Uncommon
    * Academic problems - Good grades & Very smart, but thinks "smart people are geeks".
    * Anxiety - Seems to have anxiety, but hides it well
    * Depression - Happens in "spurts", not constant.

    difficult child seems to be obsessed with having a "bad boy" image. I attribute that to wanting attention from others. The episode that sent us to the Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) was when he got caught at school sniffing a marker, setting off a stink bomb, having a thing of "spanish fly", and carrying a big wad of cash. All this happened in one day. The stink bomb was his, and he said a friend showed him how to sniff the marker. He had seen the spanish fly in a restroom and bought it (why, I have no idea). All this was "someone elses fault".

    Thanks for listening..
  2. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    Sounds just like my difficult child. I hope the medications work for you, too! Mine has been back on prozac for over a week now and the difference is literally night and day!!!!!!! I actually enjoy talking to my daughter lately. It's crazy but just goes to show that some people need medications to function normally and that is okay. Mine actually put her medication in an open spot in the living room yesterday. I think she can finally tell the difference too :)
  3. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    Oh, I wanted to add that it is not necessarily early - prozac worked on me immediately and it didn't take long to work on difficult child, either. She started them again on Tuesday last week and the already it islike I have a different child living with me.
  4. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Hi ya -

    First time talker - long time reader -

    I have a really good book recommendation for you - or anyone with a budding ODD'er- It even has a work book in it and chapters to do as you go along. It would have been a heaven sent for me with my severely ADHD and off the chart ODD with borderline trait, and so many other things mixed in son - (now 20) and a friend here got me this one and the teen one and I have read and re read them both so much they are cover bare.

    How to Talk to kids so they will listen and how to listen to kids so they will talk
    How to talk to teens so they will listen and how to listen to teens so they will talk.....

    BOTH are excellent examples of effective communication between people, not just parents. My son and I used to long ago have a silent shopping trip. Once a week we would pick a store and shop but not talk. The goal? To just LISTEN to how other Mother's spoke to their kids and how other kids spoke to their Mothers. (since it was just he and I for a long time) and IT WAS A REVELATION. It let me know a lot of areas I needed improvement and how I must look to the world that was listening to ME.......same for him. I've never heard of anyone else doing an exercise like it - but I still do it. Oddly enough - so does he. For a 20 year old kid - I think that's neat.

    just an idea - hope it helps. As far as wanting to be the bad boy? Pretty typical, but the neat thing is to show him how to be the coolest kid in the room by having the kindest behavior - can be done. But it's a work in progress - and NOT telling him it's being done - just letting him WANT to be that person. Maybe you can check with a local MENTOR agency and see if there is a big brother or shadow available for him? Schools often provide shadows FREE of charge through a childs IEP - just ask. (neat huh?) I never knew that until I came here either.

    Hugs and welcome.
  5. needprayers

    needprayers Guest

    thanks for the replies. I'll check out the book.

    we have had no major issues this week.. just the typical arguing. We did get another two evaluations back from his teachers, and they bother me. Same thing as the other teacher state:

    "He seems withdrawn at school, and sad"
    "He seems to want to get in trouble for the attention"
    "He makes inappropriate comments"
    "He interrupts teachers and other classmates"

    We had the 1st part of his IQ test this week, and the next part will be next week. Then a ADD/ADHD test.
  6. Rannveig

    Rannveig Member

    I sympathize with you, getting reports from the school like that. Hang in there -- the Zoloft (or another SSRI) may still be your answer. My recollection from when I first started SSRIs for myself many years ago is the doctor saying that there's an immediate positive effect that's short-term, then the medicine doesn't seem to be doing anything for a while until it builds up in your system, and then you get the long-term positive effect (or you don't, in which case you need to try a different medication). Anyway, the point is, that initial improvement isn't the real point of the drug, it's just a nice bonus, after which you will need to wait a while to have it really change your life. Did your son's prescribing doctor tell you anything like that? Since you're being up-front with your son, maybe you could do some more research on what to expect with Zoloft and share it with your son so that he knows what he can expect and perhaps look forward to. I've suffered from depressive illness since my teens and would have been thrilled had my dad taken a sympathetic, practical approach like that. Best wishes, Ranny