This Whole Thing Is So Messed Up

considering how l-o-n-g they take take to put any services in place for you, i find it absolutely amazing that a resigned casemanger would have the scissors to cut the red tape to end services in one.second.flat. that would require actually doing part of her job, and her track record in that department isnt exactly proven.

somewhere, somehow, somebody is blowing smoke.

i would call the supervisor, and then their supervisor, and so on until you get a straight answer and a real caseworker (since yours resigned and all) and real services in place.

dont take no for an answer.
 

rejectedmom

New Member
DF, Not knowing the actual laws in your area I cannot offer much advice except to request that the case be reopened. Get documents from her psychiatrists saying she still needs services and anything else you can think of to back up your case and remember the squeaky wheel gets the oil. hound them, guilt them, cry do whatever works to get them to listen to you. -RM
 

buddy

New Member
Despite all of the hospitalizations - the phosps simply referred us back to County MH's psychiatrist. Go there - we cannot help you.

There is no psychiatrist at County MH - he retired. No permanent replacement has been made. So no one is supervising difficult child's case.

In a very real sense - we have been 'pulling on the fire alarm' - and NO ONE is coming.

Yep. Shoved through the cracks.

So...I guess our options come down to:

1) Do nothing...and see what happens
2) Get ourselves in trouble by making a stink with DSS and law enforcement (with option 2 - IF the child is found to indeed be "troubled"...they are sentenced to House Arrest and remanded to parent custody. Whereas, if parents are found to be flakes who deserted their child - the child is placed under the care of DSS.)

:crying:
I am just so sorry for you. We all come from different places and faiths here, MHO that all good energy helps, I hope it is ok with you that I pray for you. I know we say that a lot, and I really do it, you are at the top of my list.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
I agree that it does seem awful ironic that services managed to get cut on the very day that she stayed overnight somewhere. There is no way in hades to stop them that fast. They end on the last day of the month. Thats the way it works. I have dealt with too many person centered plans to believe different. Now a worker may quit mid-stream but the services themselves only end on the last day of the month. Just like a fiscal year.

Plus...if they say they are cutting services they have to give you a letter and in that letter it has to provide you with a way to appeal that denial of services. And services must continue while you appeal the denial. So far they havent given you squat. Just flapping gums.

Now it could be that SC shuts them out at 18...that bites. I didnt realize I could have kept Cory in until 22 until I read that myself. I dont know if I would have fought for that or not. Maybe or maybe not. I was tired by 17 and withdrew him.
 

susiestar

Roll With It
So you know that only idiots work at your county level. What is the address for the state level? Where are the state offices? NOT the ones in the county that the capitol is in, but the actual executive offices? THAT is where you need to call. You need to find the top dog and then be in his face and on his case. Offer to drop your difficult child off at his office with her belongings and HE can be her Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for two months. At the end of two months if he honestly thinks she has been well served and is "fixed" then she can go live with HIM.

Seriously, get on the phone to the exec offices and give them an earful. Make sure you have an outline written out of what the problem is, the various meetings, how each time you contact them at the county office they tell you that the person suppsoed to be helping you has quit and said your daughter and family are fine and not in crisis and in the 3 or however many years you have tried to get help you have had ONE person show up maybe six times. TOTAL. You just had a meeting and were told that that person did not close your case and actually didn't document anything and that they have spent YEARS since you were approved for services and have given exactly no services and now, since your daughter spent the night with a friend, her services are cancelled because she doesn't live with you. If she doesn't live iwth you then WHY is it that the school will come after YOU if she is truant, the IRS gives YOU the deduction for having her as a dependent, and how does ONE night or even a week of nights with a friend count as not living with you? For crying out loud if you claimed that you were not responsible for her because she spent one night with another family, children's services would haul you into court and force you to take her home. but social services can claim that since she spent a single night at a friends then you don't have custody and she doesn't get services.

Trust me, the top dog does NOT want to bother with this. Calling him and tossing it onto his lap wll mean he is NOT HAPPy which means he will make someone not happy for acting like such idiots that you had to go to him to resolve the problem.

Also ask why it is that their ENTIRE budget seems to go to working very very hard to make sure that no one gets any kind of help of any kind. Are they truly spending your tax dollars to do nothing except tell parents that they can have help but they need six months to have meetings and at the end of the fourth month the case is closed because the family isn't in crisis anymore even if the problems are worse than ever before?

Makes you wonder if it wouldn't be better to just drop her off at the office of these people wiht a few outfits in a backpack. After all, they are the ones in charge and they said she doesn't live with you. So clearly they know where she does live, so you will let them explain it to her and figure it out.

But be sure you drop her off at the office of the TOP executive in the state - not the local office. Just be sure to leave a note saying that the local office said the case was closed and she doesn't live with you so you are not a family in crisis. They didn't tell you where she DOES live, so you will let them figure it out.

I wonder what would happen if you did that?
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
DF, I'm with-klmno. You/we have to get political. These are our tax dollars. husband and I only had something happen when we were trying to adopt difficult child (a different difficult child) yrs ago, and because husband was on City Council, and we knew the names of all those involved, we wrote a ltr to the editor and blasted them by name.
Guess who called 1st thing in the a.m. and said we could have any kid we wanted?
There is NO excuse for the blatant misconduct you have been experiencing.
I am so sorry.
You know that for every difficult child you have, the county has 50-100 more just like her.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
P.S. We refused to work with-them and did not get our difficult child from them, despite their embarrassment and apology. We knew d**mn well they were just making an exception in our case.
The system needs to be changed.
 

seriously

New Member
I noticed that someone said you life in SC.

Given your daughter's age, the response you are getting may have something to do with this section of the South Carolina law - Section 63, Children's Code.

SECTION 63-5-50. Parental immunity in cases of incorrigibility of seventeen year old.
A parent, guardian, or other person responsible for the care and support of a child may not be charged with unlawful neglect of a child, cruelty to a child, failure to provide reasonable support of a child, or a similar offense based on the exclusion from the home of a seventeen-year-old child where there is a demonstrable record that the child is incorrigible (beyond the control of parents).
 

DaisyFace

Love me...Love me not
I noticed that someone said you life in SC.

Given your daughter's age, the response you are getting may have something to do with this section of the South Carolina law - Section 63, Children's Code.

SECTION 63-5-50. Parental immunity in cases of incorrigibility of seventeen year old.
A parent, guardian, or other person responsible for the care and support of a child may not be charged with unlawful neglect of a child, cruelty to a child, failure to provide reasonable support of a child, or a similar offense based on the exclusion from the home of a seventeen-year-old child where there is a demonstrable record that the child is incorrigible (beyond the control of parents).

Wow! Thank you, Seriously...

I had no idea that law was on the books!

I was aware of a legal proceeding in which parents can have their child legally declared "Incorrigible" and request the state to take custody - but usually the first step in those cases is to rule the child "Incorrigible" and then place them under House Arrest. If the child then violates House Arrest enough times, they are then remanded to the state. And obviously, that seems like a huge waste of time.
 

DaisyFace

Love me...Love me not
Janet--

What you said about shutting down services that fast really makes me wonder....?

All I know is that Behavior Services "officially" started on the 18th of Sept (I think it was the 18th, it may have been the 15th - but close enough) and then Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) was supposed to "officially" start on Oct 1st...and in between there was supposed to be a meeting to review goals (again).

Then Idiot Caseworker told me the Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) was being delayed because they needed to have that meeting about the goals...so Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) was supposed to "officially" start this week...

Is it possible that Idiot Caseworker never completed the paperwork correctly? So that rather than "canceling" Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) services and Behavior Services - she just never actually filed the papers? Although, the Behavior person has been coming out and working with difficult child... ?
 

DaisyFace

Love me...Love me not
So you know that only idiots work at your county level. What is the address for the state level? Where are the state offices? NOT the ones in the county that the capitol is in, but the actual executive offices? THAT is where you need to call. You need to find the top dog and then be in his face and on his case. Offer to drop your difficult child off at his office with her belongings and HE can be her Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for two months. At the end of two months if he honestly thinks she has been well served and is "fixed" then she can go live with HIM.

Seriously, get on the phone to the exec offices and give them an earful.

Susie--

Our town does not have its own MH office, so we are being served by the county office - which is supervised by the state office. So when I speak to Ms Ally's Supervisor or Idiot Caseworker's Manager...I am dealing with the state office in the capitol. It's not a very long chain.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
Daisy, if BS started last month then there is no way in hades that they could shut down this fast, they have to be ordered for at least a period of 4 to 6 months. And if I remember correctly, didnt Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) come out to your house on the first as if they had been contracted to do so? I think the contract had been sent through. What probably hadnt been sent through was the goals that BS (lord if there isnt a better acronym I dont know what it is!) wanted Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) to do. If you had welcomed Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) into your home as if they were due there, no one would have known the difference. Until one of them ran into the other...lol. And heck, the way they run down there, they still might not know each other!

If I am right, dtr gets medicaid right? Thats how these services are paid right? They cant call foul on payment because they are authorized medicaid providers. That is the only way that they can cancel a contract in midstream is if they lose insurance coverage. Thats what happened to me. And even then my providers worked with me for 2! years free of charge. Yeah can you imagine that down there...lol. I know.

Okay, back to thinking. They dont have a psychiatrist who has tested her to assess her current level of functioning. They dont even have a therapist who has worked with her to see where she is with her goals. They have a BS who has seen her what 2 times? That is in no way enough times to tell whether or not she has made any progress towards anything. In order to move on that person centered plan and what not, she has to show progress..and measurable progress. She has to have goals. She has to have measurable goals. In order for them to let her go, you have to agree that she has met her goals. You have the right to have her work on transitioning to the adult system.

DF, do you have any of these things in writing from the state or county? If so, would you be willing to copy them and then email them to me and I will send them to my therapist who works with one of these places. I will see what she can tell us. I really wish we had done this when we were attempting to get goals done for difficult child. Remember when we were doing the stupid goals on here. I should have called Joy and had her do a PCP for your dtr. That would have been most helpful instead of us just laughing about it. Hindsight is 20/20 though.
 

DaisyFace

Love me...Love me not
That would have been most helpful instead of us just laughing about it. Hindsight is 20/20 though.

Yes - but who knew it would be this bad? I feel stupid for being so naive about this whole thing.

I really thought if I could just talk to the right person...then somehow, everything would be OK.

I'm going to send you a PM about the other...
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
Don't be hard on yourself, though. We all expect there to be a logic to this stuff.
And sometimes there is.
But - there is NO way anybody would have expected the sequence of events that actually happened.

There is just NO WAY to foresee insanity.
 

susiestar

Roll With It
I didn't know there were not regional people in the middle in your state. Here the office is in the county, but there is a regional office they report to, then the state.

But just because you are at the state level with these people does NOT mean you have the Big Cheese. Big Cheese is the guy who is in charge of it all. BC is the one who kicks tushies, or rather BC's secretary is likely the one. So find out who the top person is and jump up the ladder to him.

South Carolina Department of Health and Human Services This will take you to the DHHS website page that lists the administration. Top guy is at the top, but you could also try the director of long term care and behavioral services. You want him, or his secretary or admin assistant, and NOT whatever dept they want to transfer you to. If you can't get the director then go to the TOP guy at the top of the page.

There have been a LOT of times we got the koi you are enduring and only got help because we called the person at the top and asked them why it took X amt of time to get exactly NO help but to have Ms. Idiot tell us that we were "fixed" even though NO ONE had even spoken to us, much less given us any help.

I gave up on climbing up the chain to make my complaints. I don't climb ladders - I take the scissor lift to the top and make it the top person's problem.
 

Cheerwyn

New Member
What a mess! In administrative law, there's the term "point of entry." It varies from state to state, but in general, it means the point where the state takes an action and the person affected has the right to a hearing.

You need to keep asking -- please provide me with my formal notice of closure of benefits, and what my point of entry is to appeal that denial.
 

buddy

New Member
Yes - but who knew it would be this bad? I feel stupid for being so naive about this whole thing.

I really thought if I could just talk to the right person...then somehow, everything would be OK.

Well, you and everyone here. I mean, I think that is why we are all so outraged for you. In any sane situation this would have been true. Again, I feel like apologizing for the human race.
 

DaisyFace

Love me...Love me not
OK--

So just to get me ducks in a row - I went back and tried to figure out who the top dog would be before I have to write to the governor.

Looks like there is no "Director"....that position is listed as "Vacant".

And the "Head of Client Services" is Idiot Caseworker's Regional Manager that I've already spoken with several times. She is the one who has personally informed me that nothing is available.
 
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