Thoughts on latest scenario?

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Nomad, Feb 27, 2008.

  1. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    There is no way to delete this thread. Thank you for the help. I have posted an update.
  2. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Okay, here are my thoughts.

    Of course she would. Why not? It's only fair for your daughter to pay rent.

    This is something difficult child and her "landlord" will have to work out. Her problem, not yours. :)

    I would be very hesitant to put caveats on things you can't possibly police. It will make you miserable following up on her...and it will make her resent you for following up.

    If the move is completely contingent upon you paying the rent (she has no income of her own) then I think you need to either say yes you will without strings or no you won't, then stick to whatever your decision is.

    Is difficult child getting disability? Can that be used towards her rent instead of you paying anything?

  3. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    Suz, you make good points...thank you. (see new post).
  4. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Nomad -

    Sue gave you great advice and I agree with her. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you this morning!

  5. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    Thanks Star!!!:D
    It is interesting what changes 24 hours "might" bring.
    difficult child, on her own, found a great efficiency apartment well within her budget. Her SSI covers it fully. She received a grand total of zero help from us in doing this.

    This morning she went with us to the new facility I found (used a number I got from Mom to 3...very appreciatie). She was open to having a caseworker help her. She was nervous, but open, friendly and cooperative. husband, in particular was happy to see her show (although it was very tiny little things), some positive steps. We were both thrilled that difficult child and our family will be getting some help in the form of a caseworker! difficult child can make use of group therapy, socialization classes and other tools at the facility. We feel it is a step in the right direction.

    Next week...we all go in to make arrangements for difficult child to get a Caseworker. Hopefully, this person will be able to educate/guide difficult child and help her get more services if she needs them as well as guide her into making better decisions (like being more cooperative with vocational rehabilitation). Everyone is looking forward to it.