today

[zaftigmama]

Had to take Brownie to the dentist 90 mins away--we had an awful experience with the local pediatrician. dentist, so we're trying this one recommended to us by another difficult child mom.

The trip was pretty uneventful; Brownie watched DVDs on his player and I found the office pretty easily. At this office, they have a vending-type machine with bouncy balls and other little toys--and the kids get a token for the machine after their visit.

Brownie starts obsessing immediately on the machine. Mom, can I have a quarter? Mom, I need a quarter. Mom, give me a quarter. Mom, I said I need a quarter and on and on. I explain that even if I had any quarters, the machine doesn't take quarters, it takes tokens. I'm trying to fill out paperwork and he's whining and moaning and rolling around on the floor and of course the other kids are staring and looking frightened, and then he's crying and banging his head against the wall...in desperation, I ask the receptionist if she has another place for us to wait...she doesn't.

He did pretty OK with the dentist--for him. When we leave, he starts in with the wanting food, screaming at me for passing gas stations, that I'm stupid and he hates me, near hysteria. I'm lost but I stop at the first pizza place I see so I can feed him.

We finally make it home and husband and Brownie play some video games. When bedtime comes, I mention it and husband says, oh, but we're having a nice time, but I can see where this nice time is going to end, but I don't say anything and leave it to husband to handle. Naturally, Brownie freaks out when it's time to finally turn off the game, throws things, kicks, hits, etc...husband, of course, roars at him and rushes towards him, calls him ungrateful, etc...I of course understand his feelings but he's been with Brownie all of an hour. So my sympathy is limited.

Not sure where I'm going with all of this. I'm tired. And now I have to do my editing job. Wheeeee....

 

[Shari]

((((hugs))))

 

[TeDo]

More {{{HUGS}}}

 

[Bunny]

I of course understand his feelings but he's been with Brownie all of an hour. So my sympathy is limited.

I know that feeling well. I'm sorry it was a bad day. I hope that today is better.

 

[rdland]

Sending hugs from another mommy who understands.

 

[buddy]

what a good mommy.... really, just huge hugs going out to you...

 

[zaftigmama]

Thanks all. We go back tomorrow for the first installment of four visits--eight cavities and two root canals. Poor baby. Poor me! It's a long drive.

 

[StressedM0mma]

((Hugs)) I hope tomorrow goes more smoothly.

 

[buddy]

Oh geepers, given his issues they couldn't get an order to just put him to sleep and do it all at once??? Will they at least give him sedation? My son has a hard time with gas because he can't make himself breathe thru the nose. they even sent a gas mask home to allow him to practice. He does ok at the dentist and bless him, only has one cavity in 15 years (knock enamel, I am not so blessed).... but I fear next time it will not be pretty since he had such a hard time relaxing.

 

[zaftigmama]

The reason--well, two reasons--we're schlepping all this way is because they're a) experienced with kids like Brownie and b) can do IV sedation if needed. We're going to start with gas and novocaine, and proceed to sedation if necessary. Oh, and they take our insurance, which is a must--we pay for it, and we're gonna use it! I wish we could do it all in one go, I guess we can't because of the extent of the damage.

 

[Mamaof5]

Under a general in hospital they can do it all in one go. If the dentist who takes your insurance were to refer due to medical need to a in hospital pedi dental specialist then wouldn't it be covered? I'm in Canuk ville where referrals like that work under the gov insurance we have (social medical) for the kids. My oldest had his pseudo teeth and cavities all done under general in hospital by a pedi dentist all in one go.

I suspect my middle child will end up doing the same as soon as I can get a referral from the new doctor we have (he's on vacay out of country until April though but hey I still finally have a doctor). IV sedation is not as effective as a general in my opinion when it comes to high strung situations like dental work for kids. Especially with spec kids.

Did he say what sedative he was going to use if need be? Nitrous gas tends to wear off fast and Katamine is a type of sedation that only has a 10 to 20 minute half life (though katamine is an intramuscular sedative not intravascular aka IV). I have experience with Katamine sedation with my 6 yr old (scary how they hallucinate on it) and the doctor doing the sedation said they are too easily aroused by touch or external stimuli with katamine sedation. They twitch too (good lords and ladies did my girl twitch just as much as she did hallucinate).

Did the doctor talk to you about the pros and cons of sedation? I hope so. Anyhow, I'm rambling and thread stealing here - I'll keep you all in thought and sending board ju ju for a quick and easy.

 

[Malika]

Hi zaftigmama. Well, my heartfelt sympathies - I know what it's like to be in a waiting room full of people with a child who's careering round the place or making a big fuss about something (though in fairness to J, the last time he had to wait in a waiting room, a few days ago, he sat perfectly still on a chair for about 15 minutes looking at a comic book).
I'm just going to throw out a suggestion, that may or may not fit. So if it does not, please discard it to the four winds I have noticed on repeated occasions that my son is hyper-hyper after watching DVDs or TV. Other people have also noticed this. It is as if he is a bit crazy, a bit manic afterwards: he is super-excited and he won't listen to me at all (whereas normally, particularly lately when we have been making a lot of progress on this, he will listen, even if not the first time of asking...) If I had my way he wouldn't watch them at all but that is not the world as it is and since he sees TV/DVDs at other people's houses, I can't be too purist about it. However, we have a firm rule in place, which he accepts, that he does not watch any TV, DVD, computer, anything like that from Monday to Friday. I say all this because it struck me in your post that your son was watching DVDs before the dentist visit and was playing video games at night, so presumably he is in the habit of those things? Now, I am making absolutely no MORAL judgement about that please believe me - good lord, it's a completely normal thing for children to be doing in our age - but I am just wondering if you might want to experiment with withdrawing TV/DVD and video games for a few days, say, and seeing whether it makes any difference. To me it makes a big difference - my son listens to audio stories, has lots of stories read to him, plays with his toys, rides his bike, etc. NONE of that he would be doing if I let him watch TV. He would be glued to it in completely addictive fashion.
As I say, this may not be relevant. Just a thought.

 

[Malika]

Just an afterthought about this... I don't have the scientific lowdown on it, but I think watching visual images that are moving very fast trains a child's brain to want things now, instantly, and does not in any way encourage the skills of patience and calmness that our difficult children are so sorely lacking. Listening to stories, for example, on the other hand really develops focus and attention. My son will sit attentively to listen to a long story, perhaps because we have always done this, and I'm not sure all hyperactive kids can or will do that. But, like I say, this is such a fraught topic. I feel like trying to limit visual media, computer games, etc is like fighting a surging tide... no bloody picnic as we would say on the other side of the pond