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Parent Emeritus
Tools for Detaching? Difficult Child looks for love in all the wrong places.
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 658758" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Somewhere Out There gave you excellent advice.</p><p></p><p>Repeat this over and over to yourself: There is not one single thing I can do or say...ever...to change another person.</p><p></p><p>This is the absolute truth, and you know this already, because I would bet that for years you have tried and tried and loved and prayed and talked and cried and begged and yelled and reasoned and withheld and given and manipulated and not manipulated and walked away and walked back....you have already done it all...and look where it got you.</p><p></p><p>Focus on what you CAN do something about and that is working on yourself and managing yourself and feeling your feelings but not acting on them and figuring out what to do with all of the energy that is created but you can't use now from those feelings and...changing. </p><p></p><p>You have to change. </p><p></p><p>Or...you can keep doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result...and you know what that is. </p><p></p><p>We have to change. We deserve a great life. In order to claim that great life that is waiting there for each and every one of us...we have to change. And that takes work.</p><p></p><p>Start with the Book: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. Excellent, excellent repeatable read. </p><p></p><p>Second book: Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. I give this book to people who want to change.</p><p></p><p>Start there. And keep posting with us. We are here for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 658758, member: 17542"] Somewhere Out There gave you excellent advice. Repeat this over and over to yourself: There is not one single thing I can do or say...ever...to change another person. This is the absolute truth, and you know this already, because I would bet that for years you have tried and tried and loved and prayed and talked and cried and begged and yelled and reasoned and withheld and given and manipulated and not manipulated and walked away and walked back....you have already done it all...and look where it got you. Focus on what you CAN do something about and that is working on yourself and managing yourself and feeling your feelings but not acting on them and figuring out what to do with all of the energy that is created but you can't use now from those feelings and...changing. You have to change. Or...you can keep doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result...and you know what that is. We have to change. We deserve a great life. In order to claim that great life that is waiting there for each and every one of us...we have to change. And that takes work. Start with the Book: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. Excellent, excellent repeatable read. Second book: Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. I give this book to people who want to change. Start there. And keep posting with us. We are here for you. [/QUOTE]
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Tools for Detaching? Difficult Child looks for love in all the wrong places.
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