Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by TYLERFAN, Oct 5, 2007.


    TYLERFAN New Member

    Hi Family:

    I got fired today from a job which my boss, told me 1 month ago,that I "was doing an excellent job". :hypnosis:
    He gave me no reason why I was terminated except to say, he "needs someone who can do the job, and you are not the one" This after alot of praise and being told I was doing well..... :hammer: :smile:
    I know he fired me because I had to take off 2 days this week because Baby J was very sick and still is sick today. :smile:
    He came down with an ear infection last Tuesday, and I had to take this baby with 104 fever to a physician. I called and told my boss and he was or seemed fine. I went into work Wednesday (husband stayed home with the baby) and nothing was said, nothing!
    Thursday at 4am, Baby J has 106.4 temperature!!!! :nonono:
    Right to the ER for a numerous hours stay. But, we find out he needs a stronger anti-biotic and we get sent home to see regular pediatrician, same day. husband calls my boss and all boss says is "ok". husband even tried to explain, "this isn't her fault
    ", "she will be in tomorrow..." I feel very enraged right now, to the point that my vision is blurred :devil:
    On to my rant, which is:
    Dear MR. Boss.....
    If you have any children or neices and nephews or any kind of kids in your life, you should also know that "stuff happens" and sometimes (predominately the mother) must be the one to care for the sick child. You wouldn't realize this of course, because you don't even realize how much work your own wife does, unless it effects you and it doesn't :hammer:
    You get to hire us females less expensively than our male counter-parts and then you complain when one or more of our kids gets sick and needs to see a doctor. Would you let your sick kid not see a doctor???? Oh, I forgot, your wife takes them....Well I am someones wife and their mother and their grandmother. How would you like it it your wife's boss fired her because your kid was sick?
    OK I'm done now......WHEEEWWWWWWWWW
    I really can't see straight, this man is not even going to pay me for showing up today, I think by law he has to. He said my last day was yesterday....huh?

    I just need to vent....I feel better now. But I am filing a complaint with the state board of labor. I have never been fired in my life....all through difficult child growing up ....many days off because of that, but never fired.

  2. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    I'm not sure what the laws are in NY, but here your boss would be in violation of all sorts of labour and workplace laws.

    If there's no paper trail of poor performance, then he can't just fire you with no notice. And if he needs to let you go, then there's a notice period and severence pay required.

    Do you have copies of past performance reviews? Comments from co-workers, this boss or other supervisors? E-mail messages praising you on a good job?

    I'm glad to hear that you're going to make a complaint. What your boss did is unacceptable.

    Sending strength and hugs,
  3. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    :grrr: :devil: :nonono: :cigarsmoker: :warrior: <span style="color: #FF0000">GGGGRRRRRRRRRRRR</span>

    Oh how lame... I am so sorry. Makes you wonder what is really going on or what he had been thinking, why the nice words last week...? Doesn't make sense?

    Hang in there...
  4. ck1

    ck1 New Member

    Melissa: Wow! What a narcissistic jerk!!! I'm sure you can go on to get a better job, but that really isn't the point. If you have personal or sick days you can't be penalized for using them! Even vacation days should be ok to use without notice, but some managers can and will complain about that. You are so right, he's probably never been responsible for taking care of others so he has no idea what it takes. Uuggghhh!!

    Depending on the size of the company you work for may dictate what guidelines they have to follow when terminating an employee. Good for you for going to file a complaint. Maybe you should wait a day or two though so you can get all of your thoughts in order. Write down everything you can think of, dates of employment, responsibilities (if and when they increased), understanding regarding days off, as much detail as you can to show that this was not justified! Good luck!
  5. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat


    I am so sorry.

    What a tool.
  6. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    call unemployment asap or file online.
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    So sorry, Melissa. I hear you!

    He should have kept a file on you. In some states, ea time there is a complaint, they call you into the ofc and have you sign a piece of paper that says you discussed the issue. That way, if you're fired, it's not that huge of a surprise and the mgr has a paper trail.

    In VA, you can fire someone with-o notice of they are still in their probationary period, which is usually the first 6 wks.

    It definitely sounds like your absences did NOT make his heart grow fonder.

    Move over, Scrooge.
  8. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Oh Melissa,
    I can just imagine how angry you are!!!

    You're a good mamma/grandma...hope baby j is feeling better.

    I'm so sorry.
  9. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    He sounds like a weasel boss I had a few years ago. Wishing you luck in the coming days.

  10. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Depending upon the size of your company, NY is typically known as being an "employee friendly" state - meaning that employees have a lot of rights that they typically do not know about.

    First, call the Department of Labor and find out if he fired you without "just cause" and open a complaint against him. You will be assigned a case worker and have the opportunity to descibe the chain of events and find out if what boss did was wrong, which it sounds like it was. Then call or visit the Unemployment folks and get that ball rolling. :geek:

    What a jerk. Deplorable behavior! And you're so right about his probably never having to lift a finger to help at home or care for his children. This really made my blood boil. :grrr:

    Best of luck and I hope the baby is okay.
  11. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    I really feel for you. Our situations re: difficult child and easy child 1 is very similar (and wife is a big Tyler fan too). I used up all my personal days and VC last year dealing with difficult child issues and easy child 1 illnesses. I had to borrow VC from this year, come in to make up missed time, etc. But in my case my boss worked with me.

    Good advice from trinity on the perf. reviews, etc. But who saves that stuff at home?

    Glad you filed a complaint.

    All the best to you and new H and your family. Prayers for a positive resolution to this and for baby J's recovery.
  12. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I was fired once and it triggered a full week of depression like
    I had never experienced before or after. Sending supportive hugs
    your way.

    Now.....I'll share something that nobody ever told me until years
    after easy child/difficult child had suffered ear infections. Maybe you already know
    all about it. If so forgive me for jumping in.

    Did you know that second hand smoke (even on clothes as well as
    furniture etc) is proven to be related to ear infections? My husband
    and I both smoked when we raised easy child/difficult child. We never ever smoked
    in front of him but we did smoke in the house after he went to
    bed and when we were out etc. He had mega ear problems and had
    to have tubes etc.

    When the ear specialist asked about smoke and I told the truth
    he gave me the scoop. It made a huge positive difference in
    easy child/difficult child's health when we limited our smoking to the yard. DDD
  13. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    So sorry Melissa. Don't let him get you down. There are other jobs out there and maybe you will be pleasantly surprised to find a different place even better to work for.

  14. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I'm so sorry. This really bites. Mean people :censored2:!

    I was going to ask if NY was an employee or an employer state, but Jo stated it was an employee state which is really good for you. That should mean you have an easier time getting unemployment - good for you AND has the added benefit of increasing your employers unemployment taxes. The jerk deserves it.

    Ohio is an employer state and unless you were laid off, it's hard to get unemployment. However, I did payroll for a company and we had an office in Kansas which was an employee state. We had people getting unemployment that shouldn't have been just because we stated on their complaint file (signed by the employee) that they MAY be fired if x happened again. Had we said they WOULD be fired, they wouldn't have gotten unemployment. Just to give you an idea of the difference in an employee vs employer state...

    I'd file that complaint with the Dept of Labor. Even if nothing comes of it, the jerk needs to squirm.
  15. tinamarie1

    tinamarie1 Member

    About 10 years ago, my grandmother was hit by a drunk driver. She was closterphobic (sp?) and refused to get into the ambulance and go to the hospital. So she called me at work and said her chest hurt really bad and she wanted me to take her to the ER. I was working for a pediatrician at the time and his crazy wife ran the office. They were both at their house eating lunch and i called him and asked if this was ok (for me to leave and take her to the ER). He said absolutely!
    Well, she had a collapsed lung and some other internal injuries and needed surgery asap. I called back to the office to let them know what was going on and that I was staying until she got out of surgery. His wife answered the phone and after I told her all of this, she said, you know Tina, your grandmother is NOT your responsibility, and we really need you here too. Well, my mom was a hair dresser and had just poured perm solution onto this ladys hair and she could not just pick up and leave (she has a little shop where she is the only worker).
    Anyway, scared for my job, I (stupid stupid) left the hospital and came back to work that evening. That set off his wife in the worst way! She said, why are you back? I didn't tell you you had to come back! I just calmly said, no its ok, I will go back to the hospital after work and be with her. I guess this made her feel like complete :censored2: in front of the other girls and her husband.
    A few days later, he fired me. He said I was rude to his wife.
    It was also 2 weeks before Christmas and we had no extra money. I boo hooed for what seemed like days. I only lived 2 blocks from his office and every time I drove by I would think of evil things I could do to get even...but I never did.
    That is the only job I have ever been fired from. But they were the idiots, and I have to accept that and move on.
    I was blessed about a month later when I got my first job as an insurance agent and I have been doing that for the last 12 years (up until we moved). I look at it as a blessing he fired me, but it sure was hard to see that at the time.
  16. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member


    I'm sorry to hear this. The boss seems like a real loser! I hope Baby J is o.k. Hugs.
  17. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so sorry. I was fired for "attendance issues" because I kept having to take off to take difficult child to various therapist and surgeons, etc... He had urinary issues and ear infections and got strep if someone walked past his school with it. They didn't' have to go in, just go past!

    I was SOOOO upset. They had tried to fire me before when I took FMLA leave. It was about 3 months later that corporate changed the "attendance" policy to count every day you were not at work as an "occurence" no matter what kind of leave it was.

    My bosses spent an entire day fighting with corporate, but they had to fire me.

    It ended up being a good thing, but I understand how depressed and angry you are feeling.

    (Just don't do what I did, sink into depression and not file a complaint. Also don't get a job at the neighborhood liquor store. I never did drink much, it was a fun job, but it lookes really strange when the job youget after youare fired is at the liquor store! )


  18. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    File a complaint, for sure.

    husband got fired years ago, he should have filed a complaint but just wanted to put it all behind him. He really had grounds, he got shafted right royally, with no grounds whatsoever. We never knew why, but after a couple of years we sort of worked it out - we think he had been accused behind his back of industrial espionage, because he had to totally change careers, the word was out. Then 18 months later, the job offers back in that industry came pouring in - somehow, his name had been cleared. We never did find out. But if we'd complained, we would have. They had really milked him dry in that job, making him work often 12 hours a day (he was on salary, not paid by the hour) and he was exhausted.

    The rules as they USED to be in Australia - if your boss is unhappy with your performance, he should call you in for "counselling". This involves a warning letter also, which is then followed up with a performance review within a few weeks - have you lifted your game? On the third warning letter within a couple of months, you're out. However, some 'crimes' could lead to instant dismissal - for example, theft; industrial espionage (which is also theft, in its own way). Failure to follow the rules would often lead to the complaint of the worker being upheld.
    NOW - we have a government which has thrown all this away. We have "Workplace Agreements". Workers on contracts which give them, say, $25 an hour, 8 days sick leave a year and four weeks' annual leave are finding themselves sacked (no reasons now need be given; an employer can now sack someone purely because they can no longer afford that person, all they have to do is make a statement to that effect) and then finding themselves offered their old jobs back, but at a much lower hourly rate and often as casual staff (ie NO sick leave; NO annual leave; NO other rights).
    Most jobs now, especially for young people, are on a casual basis. Our unemployment is running below 4% (government figures, which means they are a gross underestimate). To be considered "employed" you need to be working a minimum 15 hours a week, on average. And in a casual job, you would think this would make it easier if you have a sick kid - no way.
    easy child 2/difficult child 2's jobs (other than her performing work) to date have both been casual. Her first job was in a bakery franchise, she had to work behind the counter. The boss KNEW about her acting/circus work when he hired her, it was on her resumé and on her application letter. I was also there and explained it to him (English not his first language; but his English is good enough to run a business). OK, if any performing work came up she would simply take the time off work at the bakery without pay. Then she got a BIG acting job, it kept her busy for a month, plus another couple of weeks' waiting time while they re-scheduled filming. The trouble with acting jobs, you don't always get a lot of notice about changes. She could be told in the evening, "Be at Farmer Bill's property past Penrith by 7 am tomorrow morning." So she told the boss at the bakery that she would be off work until a certain date. She gave him this in writing, along with the reason - she was making a film.

    Then after a couple of weeks, the boss begins to ring me up. "When will easy child 2/difficult child 2 be well enough to come back to work?"
    "She's not ill, we told you - she is making a film. It will be on TV early next year. She will be finished and ready to work for you by the middle of next month."
    "Tell her I hope she feels well soon and to give me a call, OK?"
    When she finally got back to work, he took her and and told her, "You were absent for many weeks. From now on when you are ill, I will need a medical certificate from you, even for only one day."
    In vain she tried to explain she wasn't ill and hadn't been; that he HAD known where she was and what she was doing; that he DID know of her acting work before he ever hired her and that as a casual employee, she didn't have to provide ANY reasons or justification for taking unpaid time off work, especially if she gave plenty of notice (as she had) so he could roster someone else on.
    So he then began to give her short shifts. She would check the roster book and find she was working only on two days, for three hours each day. It was costing her more to get to work by public transport, than she was making. She asked for more shifts and was told he'd think about it. Now, short shifts is a way a lot of bosses use to either push their staff into resigning, or to punish them and keep them in line.
    easy child 2/difficult child 2 decided to get a second job. She knew a lot of girls from the bakery left to work at a nearby fruit shop so she went and talked to them (also telling them about her occasional performing work). They offered to train her to see if they were willing to hire her. So she began training - she trained with them for weeks. This involved two days a week (in between her bakery shifts) working, unpaid but supervised, in the fruit shop. They got free labour out of her but she stuck it out with the promise of more pay pr hour, if they eventually chose to hire her. But at this training stage - no certainty of a job at all. easy child 2/difficult child 2 was hoping to work in both shops, so she could have some variety.

    Then the bakery shop owner found out. His wife went in to buy some fruit and saw easy child 2/difficult child 2 having training. Within minutes, the baker was in the fruit shop, screaming in his broken English at the staff there to stop stealing his staff, that they were behaving in an underhand fashion and they were bad businessmen to do this. All this in front of customers!
    The fruit shop managers took easy child 2/difficult child 2 aside. "We cannot have this happening. You need to sort out who you're working for. We understand you hoped to work for both of us, but clearly he doesn't accept this. We cannot have him coming in here embarrassing us in front of our customers - go see him and sort this out."
    So STILL without any surety of a job at the fruit shop. easy child 2/difficult child 2 went to see her bakery boss. He sacked her on the spot for being disloyal.

    I rang the government agency that deals with this sort of thing. Our government's new laws made this situation possible, but because she had been employed BEFORE the new legislation came in, and for a number of years, the baker technically couldn't sack her. However, he COULD refuse to give her ANY shifts, which is what happened. She wrote to him (with my help) and explained in writing that it was illegal for him to sack her without any warning letters or any indication she was not doing a good job and explaining that she had all along intended to keep working for him; but to just pad out her shifts with a second job.
    Now the baker denied (verbally) that he had sacked her. She got nothing in writing from him. Neither did she get any shifts.
    And the fruit shop? They COULD have said, "get lost, you bring trouble when this man screams at us," but they didn't. They hired her. At half as much money again as the baker had paid, so she was happy. After some time,s the baker approached her (she walked past every day to go to the fruit shop) and asked when she would be returning hr uniform. "I thought I was still employed by you?" she asked him sweetly. "I've been waiting for shifts." But she did put him out of his misery and resign. She also gave up on her wrongful dismissal claim - at the low hourly rate he had been paying her, she wouldn't have got more than about $50 from him.

    Now - she gets paid more but it's still not a huge amount. And when a supervisor got a bit annoyed with her one day, he cut her shifts back hard to punish her. She finally had to ask someone else to get her put on more shifts or she would have to find another job that would let her work more (because as a casual, she only gets paid for what work they let her do). So the person organising the roster did a check on the staff records and found that easy child 2/difficult child 2 has the highest accuracy on the checkouts, of all the staff in the shop. She used that to get her as many shifts as she wants and the supervisor could do nothing, without giving a reason to not do this. Which, since it was just him on a power trip, he could not do.

    She has again been asked to provide a medical certificate for any absence where she calls in sick, but now this is legal - virtually anything an employer asks for is legal, by definition now. Luckily, we don't have the medical costs that you have in the US. So when she got appendicitis, she had to get certificate after certificate, each time she saw a doctor. More certificates for the time off for surgery. More certificates to say she was not permitted to lift anything heavy for six weeks. And so on.
    She did another film while working at the fruit shop - rehearsal through January, filming on 25th. But no problems with them at all. She was even able to take in some photos from the film set to show her workmates.

    So if a boss treats you badly, take action. Or at least, begin to - it scares the pants off them. It also leaves you with the option to continue or to drop it, as you choose. But if you leave it too long, it's very hard to go back a few months later and file a complaint.

    We may have a better health system but right now our employment system is like a vacuum cleaner - it uses a certain method to pick up dust, and it's full of crud.

    Have confidence in knowing that you don't have to work for someone this narrow-minded.

  19. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    You can file a complaint, however I'm going to hazard a guess that you are considered an "at will" employee. There is no contract for employment. An at will employee can be terminated at any time; in the same right, the employee can leave at any time.

    The wording of employment law has changed over the years & not in favor of an employee.

    Most companies have in their employee manual the termination process; however it doesn't have to be followed. Most large companies do follow this so they can avoid wrongful termination lawsuits.

    I don't know what to tell you - I don't personally know NY employment law; federal employment laws change all the time.

    Hang in there Melissa.
  20. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Linda took the words out of my mouth. I don't know about NY but PA is an "at will" state so you can be terminated at any time for just about any reason. Plus, as a new employee you probably didn't have any paid leave accumulated yet which also complicates the works.

    It doesn't make your boss any less of a jerk, though. :grrr:

    I'm sorry, Melissa.