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Trying hard to not answer the phone
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 690752" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>Alaska- first of all, thank you serving our country. My Middle son and my daughter both served in Iraqi Freedom. </p><p></p><p>Yeah kids are pretty good at emotional manipulation. But don't buy into it. YOU owe them nothing- they are adults. YOU gave them shelter, food, clothing, financial support to get out in the world on their own. They start throwing this at you- tell them it's time to put their big boy panties on and get on with their life. What they are doing is emotional bullying. Been down that road. I refuse to allow to eat the crap on a spoon they try to serve me. YOU didn't create this mess, they are adults, you gave them some financial assistance to get out on their own. We all have done that. </p><p></p><p>YOU need to start living for you young Lady. Detach, read the detachment document here. It is very inspiring. I read it and it propelled me to such a good place. I no longer am able to be made to feel guilty about any and all decisions I made with Difficult Child. I made those decisions at the time that I thought was best. </p><p></p><p>I would text him his brothers phone number and I would text him happy birthday. That's it. I wouldn't answer the phone calls for a while. I once did 6 months of tough love with Difficult Child. It was hard but got easier as time went by. I was able to recharge my batteries, my mental and emotional health got better. I was so tired and just felt so used up. Years later, Difficult Child told me, Mom that was the best thing you did for me, stop taking my calls. It made me grow up. Well, he did grow up for a while, then fell into a bad crowd and slid. But he is at a good place now, years later.</p><p></p><p>Time to start living for you. YOU did your job as a parent. YOU don't owe them anything.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 690752, member: 19951"] Alaska- first of all, thank you serving our country. My Middle son and my daughter both served in Iraqi Freedom. Yeah kids are pretty good at emotional manipulation. But don't buy into it. YOU owe them nothing- they are adults. YOU gave them shelter, food, clothing, financial support to get out in the world on their own. They start throwing this at you- tell them it's time to put their big boy panties on and get on with their life. What they are doing is emotional bullying. Been down that road. I refuse to allow to eat the crap on a spoon they try to serve me. YOU didn't create this mess, they are adults, you gave them some financial assistance to get out on their own. We all have done that. YOU need to start living for you young Lady. Detach, read the detachment document here. It is very inspiring. I read it and it propelled me to such a good place. I no longer am able to be made to feel guilty about any and all decisions I made with Difficult Child. I made those decisions at the time that I thought was best. I would text him his brothers phone number and I would text him happy birthday. That's it. I wouldn't answer the phone calls for a while. I once did 6 months of tough love with Difficult Child. It was hard but got easier as time went by. I was able to recharge my batteries, my mental and emotional health got better. I was so tired and just felt so used up. Years later, Difficult Child told me, Mom that was the best thing you did for me, stop taking my calls. It made me grow up. Well, he did grow up for a while, then fell into a bad crowd and slid. But he is at a good place now, years later. Time to start living for you. YOU did your job as a parent. YOU don't owe them anything. [/QUOTE]
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