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Turning Child Over to State
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<blockquote data-quote="jcox" data-source="post: 284292" data-attributes="member: 6583"><p>We had to do this a little over one year ago for my stepson. It was one of the hardest things we have ever done, but also one of the best for him. We tried other ways of getting him help first, without sucess. Last March we requested voluntary help through DCF, had our intake apt. where they told us they would give us services for him, but then we did not hear back from them. We also got a CHINS on him that month, which also did not do much good.</p><p> </p><p>Come last May things got worse. Some of his issues were smoking weed, having drugs in our house, being very defiant, trying to physically fight with my husband, being very disrespectful to me, running away, cutting himself, stealing from us and others, and more. In May of last year, actually the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend we called the police on him. He went for a walk with my then 5 y.o son E, one of C's friends, and our puppy. E comes home and says he did not want to go to jail, but C gave him a smoke and he smoked it. We confronted C, he got very mad, and ran away. His friend then showed us his stash of weed in a teddy bear which we had the police get when they came. They found C right down the street from our house, thankfully they responded quickly. They took him to lock up for the weekend because of his CHINS. We had court that next Tuesday scheduled for his CHINS already.</p><p> </p><p>That weekend hubby and I thought long and hard about what to do. What would be best for our family as a whole? What would be best for Charlie? We decided not to let him come back home because he needed more help then we could give him. That Tuesday we went to court and basically refused to take him home. The judge did not give us any problems and put him in DCF custody. He went into one regular foster home, and four therapeutic foster homes in three months before he went to the psychiatric hospital for not taking his medications and being suicidal. Even the therapeutic foster homes he was in who were specially trained to deal with children with special needs and behavioral issues could not deal with him. From the psychiatric hospital he went to an acute treatment center with a school on campus. While he was in there the clinicians there, C's lawyer, our lawyer, and DCF began talking about an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement for him. DCF and our school district did a cost share for his placement. Like the schools they had to prove that he needed that level of care by going from the least restrictive environment and moving his way up which he did quickly. </p><p> </p><p>Now he is scheduled to come home on the 26th which is this Friday because his Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is closing. We hope that he has learned some skills needed to cope with life better now. He has been out of our home for one year and a month. I know that putting him in DCF care was the best thing we could have done for him and for our whole family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jcox, post: 284292, member: 6583"] We had to do this a little over one year ago for my stepson. It was one of the hardest things we have ever done, but also one of the best for him. We tried other ways of getting him help first, without sucess. Last March we requested voluntary help through DCF, had our intake apt. where they told us they would give us services for him, but then we did not hear back from them. We also got a CHINS on him that month, which also did not do much good. Come last May things got worse. Some of his issues were smoking weed, having drugs in our house, being very defiant, trying to physically fight with my husband, being very disrespectful to me, running away, cutting himself, stealing from us and others, and more. In May of last year, actually the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend we called the police on him. He went for a walk with my then 5 y.o son E, one of C's friends, and our puppy. E comes home and says he did not want to go to jail, but C gave him a smoke and he smoked it. We confronted C, he got very mad, and ran away. His friend then showed us his stash of weed in a teddy bear which we had the police get when they came. They found C right down the street from our house, thankfully they responded quickly. They took him to lock up for the weekend because of his CHINS. We had court that next Tuesday scheduled for his CHINS already. That weekend hubby and I thought long and hard about what to do. What would be best for our family as a whole? What would be best for Charlie? We decided not to let him come back home because he needed more help then we could give him. That Tuesday we went to court and basically refused to take him home. The judge did not give us any problems and put him in DCF custody. He went into one regular foster home, and four therapeutic foster homes in three months before he went to the psychiatric hospital for not taking his medications and being suicidal. Even the therapeutic foster homes he was in who were specially trained to deal with children with special needs and behavioral issues could not deal with him. From the psychiatric hospital he went to an acute treatment center with a school on campus. While he was in there the clinicians there, C's lawyer, our lawyer, and DCF began talking about an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement for him. DCF and our school district did a cost share for his placement. Like the schools they had to prove that he needed that level of care by going from the least restrictive environment and moving his way up which he did quickly. Now he is scheduled to come home on the 26th which is this Friday because his Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is closing. We hope that he has learned some skills needed to cope with life better now. He has been out of our home for one year and a month. I know that putting him in DCF care was the best thing we could have done for him and for our whole family. [/QUOTE]
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