two pronged Jamie post

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DammitJanet, Jul 9, 2008.

  1. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    First of all...please keep up the good thoughts for him because he is really wrestling with demons over this upcoming deployment. He sounds extremely stressed and a tad bit depressed over the whole thing. I cant blame him at all. He feels like he has the weight of the world on him right now. He is so ultra-responsible and feels like he has to take care of everyone...his wife and daughter, his brothers, and me and his dad. He worries about all of us. He has always been the one I could call on in any emergency and he would come running. If I was having a bad day with Cory...he talked to me on the phone. He even talked to the cops for me. Now he is worried about what will happen if (God forbid) he isnt here anymore for us all. Thats a whole lot of worry on him and he doesnt even turn 24 until this friday. He told me yesterday he feels like he knows what Cory feels like facing prison because that is what he feels like he is going to...prison...but that he has an even greater chance of dying than if he was just going to we cant even go visit him like if he was in jail. Sigh.

    Im worried about him.

    Now...onto prong two.

    I think they got the difficult OK...I dont just think it, Im pretty darned sure! Ever since Hailie came home from the hospital she has been a fussy baby who wanted her way...and only her way. She has always thrown pretty good fits. Now she is on her feet and toddling around and its even more apparent. She refuses to stay in the buggy at a store. She throws herself around and screams until they let her down. Then she starts toddling off as fast as she can, taking things off shelves, screaming. If they try to stop her, she darts the other way...screaming. If told no...she screams and does it anyway.

    She has learned to maneuver around the baby gate and climb up the stairs. Even if she falls down, she gets back up and does it again. No matter how often the tell her no, she does it anyway. smells difficult child.
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    Jamie is feeling much the same way my nephew felt before he deployed. It's so tough on them. And I imagine scarey as h*ll too. The waiting drove him nuts. Then at almost the last second they decided they'd rather have him train the boys going over and so far have kept him stateside. Fair to me, as it would've been I think his 3rd time over there. (he was in desert storm too)

    Sounds like Mom is gonna have her hands full with the baby while he's gone. lol

    How much longer before he leaves?

  3. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Sending positive vibes and hugs, Janet. I have no idea what this feels like and I hope I never do, but it sounds like Jamie is torturing himself with worry. I hope he's able to calm his mind and heart.

    difficult child baby, hmmm...:whiteflag:
  4. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    A big hug Janet. Pcdaughter's boyfriend was here this past weekend. He is set to deploy to the big Stan next August. I know he is nervous about it. But, we have a year. And a lot can change in a year. I'll keep praying for all of our troops---especially jamie and boyfriend---and easy child :(
  5. Star*

    Star* call 911


    Your post made me tear up and put a huge lump in my throat. I guess I never really consider how lucky we are to have young men like Jamie in our Armed Forces. I'm thankful for all your kids, and you know I have a soft spot forever for Cory. I'm thankful for you too. Moms of Marines don't get nearly enough accolades.


    As far as the difficult child - I'm not going to smell yet - I am going to hope she's just going through a "stage" - and I think -


    Gosh are we really this old?

    Hugs to you - extra big ones.
  6. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen


    I cannot imagine the fear that goes into our soldiers. I applaud Jaime for stepping up to the plate, but also fear for him. He's a guy. He most likely will not tell what is on his mind, but my best guess he's scared as cra*. Not just for himself, but for what you described...his family. That is a tribute to you as well. You've raised him well.

    As far as a fussy young one...I better not reply. I'm too old-schooled. ;)

    Give Jaime a cyber hug of thousands and our well wishes.

  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I kinda teared up myself when I heard him on the phone. He also told his dad that he just feels like he has no one to talk to about this but his dad is going to try to get him alone for a bit of time and if he will talk to anyone, it will be his dad. I am also going to call my Dad and have him call Jamie to talk about being in a war. Now my dad is very reticent about talking about what went on when he was on his ship in Guadacanal for 3 years but I think if anyone can help Jamie pull it together, he can.

    And Abbey...about the First thing out of her Papa's mouth was "have they smacked them lil legs to let her know who's boss?" LOL. I have to admit we have had to pop a diaper or hand a time or two with Miss Priss here and then sit her in time out but that snaps her out quickly. Somehow I dont think Hailie is going to be so easy because she reminds me of Cory so much...she even has a birthmark in the same place he

    Oh and I told Jamie that he really should consider himself lucky because he has tons of Board Aunties and Uncles from all across the US and even other countries that will be rattling beads, lighting candles and praying for him daily until he gets his feet back on US soil. I told him I have seen the power of this board and I am holding fast to the thoughts that this board will pull him through.
  8. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    You are not kidding about the board aunties. I hope he knows how proud we are of him.

    You will see him before he goes?
  9. Christy

    Christy New Member

    I can't even imagine what your son is feeling. I'm thankful for his service to the country but hopeful that the troops are sent home safe and soon!

    So Hailie is a "chip off the old block"! I guesss she will be giving her parents a whole new perspective on the difficult child/parent relationship.
  10. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Saying prayers for Jaime. I can't imagine what that must be like.

    How did Jaime end up with Cory's kid? :tongue:
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member theory is that Jamies wife is no picnic (I have always said he married his mother) and then the baby got a double dose of those difficult child genes. She does this pouty face that looks just like me when I get into a funk...lmao.
  12. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    We were talking about genes tonight. Wynter hasn't seen her dad since she was about 3 and she hasn't lived with him since she was 18 months old. But she has always - since an infant - flicked her toes JUST like he does.

    Imagine that. Somewhere on her DNA is a 'toe-flicking' gene. :rofl:

    Somewhere in your DNA is a 'pouty-face' gene that got passed along, too, apparently.
  13. Hopeless

    Hopeless ....Hopeful Now

    Janet - sending hugs and prayers for Jaime and all of you during this. My family is military and I know how you are feeling.
  14. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Bless sweet Jamie's heart. I always think of him when remembering the soldiers who do us proud.

    Janet, coming from a responsible "fixer" tell Jamie that he is not the sole caretaker for everyone. When it gets to the point that he is drowning in other's needs, he has to sit back and save himself. His wife is an adult. His brother's are adults and his parents are adults. They can all pitch in and pull some of the weight he is carrying. If he allows others to bridge the gap, he will feel less overwhelmed and others will be more involved in their own ability to be able to fix things. He can become addicted to being the saver and find that he lost himself.

    If I had to do it over again, I would have really worked hard on behavior modification. I would have researched and intervened much more in difficult child's behavior at that young age instead of trying to convince myself that he was just being a boy or an only child. It was all nonsense and denial on my part. None of it has to be punishment but redirecting behavior to receive a approval/reward. The older I get the less inclined I am to the smack on the butt. I used it until 5 but I wouldn't if I had to do it again.
  15. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Well, like I said before, I am in complete understanding that I am a chicken and could never go to war. It's just not in me. BUT, and this is a BIG BUT, I truly appreciate those who do. I don't know how they get the courage to do so. Auntie hugs to you and Jaime.

    So, I give back in the small ways I can. (Believe me, they're small compared to what they do.) I routinely do parties for free at Nellis AFB for returning troups that are here for a whopping 2 weeks. They have a great time, but it's so sad that they are going back. I look at these guys/gals and wonder if they'll be around in a year.

    In the end, Jaime should be extremely proud of what he is doing, albiet probably scared. There are many people like me that do not have the guts to make that venture. Please let him know there are many 'Aunties" thinking about him.

  16. WhymeMom?

    WhymeMom? No real answers to life..

    Saying prayers for Jamie and hoping his deployment is defferred to far as Hallie being difficult child.....sounds hauntingly familiar.......oh....thinking of you and your family.......