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Typical kid versus difficult child behaviors....
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<blockquote data-quote="helpmehelphim" data-source="post: 22181" data-attributes="member: 2650"><p><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What I REALLY hate - the family members who lecture you on how to raise a child, even to the point of saying, "Maybe he's not really autistic; maybe you're just over-anxious to what is really, just normal behaviour. I mean, look at you - poised like a cat to jump in, when he's only having a wrestle on the floor with his cousins."</p><p>Then, when one of the cousins gets hurt accidentally, or hurts difficult child 3 and he punches them back, I get criticised because I haven't socialised him properly, because I'm too over-protective. "If only you let him mix more with other kids, this sort of thing wouldn't happen." </div></div></p><p></p><p>Oh Marg, I hate this too. And I have gotten it so much! Just had my last round of it at Christmas with family. I got a lecture on how it's "just normal kid behavior...they all act like that...you just don't know enough about it" to "this child needs more discipline" by the end of their stay. And they don't even get it that they are saying those two conflicting things. There's got to be someone to blame for the whole thing and I'm a good candidate for some reason...I was careful to pack the blame up with- them when they left this year...keep what you brought. I've had plenty!</p><p></p><p>I didn't realize others had this going on with- family. We've actually spent far less time with- family in the past 2 to 3 years simply because of it and the lack of support. We all seem to do much better at my house if we have some like minded people around for support. </p><p></p><p>My son has a lot of trouble de-ramping (is that a word) or unramping (nope, it doesn't look right either). And he gets ramped up easily especially around other kids. I hear the voice level rise and the tone change. It gets pushed too far many times. This is his biggest hurdle socially. I need to throw in there though that my easy child can get it going on himself as well. They are 11.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="helpmehelphim, post: 22181, member: 2650"] <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What I REALLY hate - the family members who lecture you on how to raise a child, even to the point of saying, "Maybe he's not really autistic; maybe you're just over-anxious to what is really, just normal behaviour. I mean, look at you - poised like a cat to jump in, when he's only having a wrestle on the floor with his cousins." Then, when one of the cousins gets hurt accidentally, or hurts difficult child 3 and he punches them back, I get criticised because I haven't socialised him properly, because I'm too over-protective. "If only you let him mix more with other kids, this sort of thing wouldn't happen." </div></div> Oh Marg, I hate this too. And I have gotten it so much! Just had my last round of it at Christmas with family. I got a lecture on how it's "just normal kid behavior...they all act like that...you just don't know enough about it" to "this child needs more discipline" by the end of their stay. And they don't even get it that they are saying those two conflicting things. There's got to be someone to blame for the whole thing and I'm a good candidate for some reason...I was careful to pack the blame up with- them when they left this year...keep what you brought. I've had plenty! I didn't realize others had this going on with- family. We've actually spent far less time with- family in the past 2 to 3 years simply because of it and the lack of support. We all seem to do much better at my house if we have some like minded people around for support. My son has a lot of trouble de-ramping (is that a word) or unramping (nope, it doesn't look right either). And he gets ramped up easily especially around other kids. I hear the voice level rise and the tone change. It gets pushed too far many times. This is his biggest hurdle socially. I need to throw in there though that my easy child can get it going on himself as well. They are 11. [/QUOTE]
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