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<blockquote data-quote="Tired Mom" data-source="post: 661164" data-attributes="member: 18222"><p>Hi lovemyson1 - My son is 21. He is in a pretrial intervention program. The last verified communication with his parole officer was that he was coming home mid August. Right now I think unless he communicates with his parole officer he legally has to come back. I know before my son even relapsed he had started to wanting to go back and finish community college and consistently has said that is what he wants to do. When he was in rehab his counselor had initially though he should try to make a new life for himself there but then seemed to change her mind and was supportive of his idea of coming back here and going to school. I had questioned the counselor on this but she thought it was a good idea. I am not sure if the school will even be a possibility. He tried to register and it said he was ineligible. We haven't got the whole story yet but I do see on the college website that they have the right to continuously do background checks and kick you out of the school at any time if the background check finds anything. It has crossed my mind that the community college has come across his pretrial intervention or overdose and they may not let him register. Neither my husband nor I really think the degree will make a difference for him but my husband thought since it is relatively cheap and it would be him working towards something positive we would support it. I totally get what you are saying about why are we letting him come back. Sigh it is really hard to go back on what we had agreed to without direct evidence that he has started using. I will feel better if I find out he is being drug tested at house he is at. We had been thinking we would try to find as short of a lease on a apartment as we could find (ideally a one month lease) and by the end he would need to find out some other living arrangement.</p><p></p><p>I was really more opposed to him coming back initially but had softened when I found out he is seeing people do drugs where he is right now. When he lost his ID's twice. Knowing how gullible he is. Knowing that his job is paying him in cash but somehow taking taxes out and he really doesn't know if he will get a W2 and is afraid to ask. Sigh it is so hard to detach so hard to make him grow up. Take the firm stance if you want to come back you have to go to the police station, you have to buy the ticket, and you have to fly by yourself. Sometimes I feel like he is almost a handicapped child. His social skills were so low to start off with and both my husband and I think he suffered some brain damage between the four months when he moved out of our house a year ago and when he overdosed in October.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tired Mom, post: 661164, member: 18222"] Hi lovemyson1 - My son is 21. He is in a pretrial intervention program. The last verified communication with his parole officer was that he was coming home mid August. Right now I think unless he communicates with his parole officer he legally has to come back. I know before my son even relapsed he had started to wanting to go back and finish community college and consistently has said that is what he wants to do. When he was in rehab his counselor had initially though he should try to make a new life for himself there but then seemed to change her mind and was supportive of his idea of coming back here and going to school. I had questioned the counselor on this but she thought it was a good idea. I am not sure if the school will even be a possibility. He tried to register and it said he was ineligible. We haven't got the whole story yet but I do see on the college website that they have the right to continuously do background checks and kick you out of the school at any time if the background check finds anything. It has crossed my mind that the community college has come across his pretrial intervention or overdose and they may not let him register. Neither my husband nor I really think the degree will make a difference for him but my husband thought since it is relatively cheap and it would be him working towards something positive we would support it. I totally get what you are saying about why are we letting him come back. Sigh it is really hard to go back on what we had agreed to without direct evidence that he has started using. I will feel better if I find out he is being drug tested at house he is at. We had been thinking we would try to find as short of a lease on a apartment as we could find (ideally a one month lease) and by the end he would need to find out some other living arrangement. I was really more opposed to him coming back initially but had softened when I found out he is seeing people do drugs where he is right now. When he lost his ID's twice. Knowing how gullible he is. Knowing that his job is paying him in cash but somehow taking taxes out and he really doesn't know if he will get a W2 and is afraid to ask. Sigh it is so hard to detach so hard to make him grow up. Take the firm stance if you want to come back you have to go to the police station, you have to buy the ticket, and you have to fly by yourself. Sometimes I feel like he is almost a handicapped child. His social skills were so low to start off with and both my husband and I think he suffered some brain damage between the four months when he moved out of our house a year ago and when he overdosed in October. [/QUOTE]
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