Update and thankyou

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by missusoverall, Sep 26, 2007.

  1. missusoverall

    missusoverall New Member

    Like most of you, we were very apprehensive about going back to school - our difficult child has a problem with authority, rules, seeking attention etc. We know he tries to grind us down, he knows which buttons to push to hurt us but we just keep repeating the rules at home and refuse to argue with him (not easy and very, very wearing...) He can also be loving and thoughtful.
    10 days after the return to school (and a new teacher who difficult child called 'his next victim' while stroking a white cat - Blofeld styley), he had, what I've seen you describe on here, a complete meltdown - for no apparent reason. He had to be restrained by 2 adults or I think he would've wrecked the place and hurt himself. My mum held him tight till he calmed right down and he was fine.
    2 days later on the Monday morning he cracked a joke in class - he has never been good with appropriateness of behaviour - and his teacher lost it. We knew he was having difficulty with difficult child because he kept sending him to stand in the corridor as punishment and anyone with a difficult child like ours knows, that is just a prime and juicy challenge. Every half a minute he kept opening the door saying 'can I come in,yet' - totally disrupting the class and outraging the teacher. Anyway, this fateful monday morning he sent difficult child out into the corridor again as punishment but Alex refused to go, so the teacher hit him. No, it is not allowed here and yes it was in front of about 20 disgusted witnesses. I nearly shook myself out of my wheelchair with my controlled rage welling up inside as I challenged his teacher. What bothers us the most is that this man is not sorry or interested in adopting more effective classroom management techniques.
    All of this led to us calling an emergency meeting with his psychiatrist. Well after 6 months of feeling like we're getting nowhere with this dept. (they said they weren't interested in diagnosing even though we said we needed orientation as to what this was and a diagnosis might give Alex access to services which could help him :hammer:), we were faced with a brand new psychiatrist who listened and asked pertinent questions. She has taken difficult child off anti-depressants and put him on concerta and risperdal. She is gonna monitor him closely and although she mentioned ADD, she said it was never a 'stand alone' diagnosis. I could've kissed her (but I didn't...). We've heard so much condescending psychobabble my head was beginning to hurt :rolleyes:.
    The teacher, we are dealing with. The medications, we have hope but more importantly we feel listened to and we're working towards a diagnosis.
    I think you are all amazing people - without this forum, I think I would've crumbled in despair months ago. Your honesty and insight has given strength to me and husband to keep pursuing and insisting!
    THANK YOU!! :flower:
    Sarah x
  2. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Dear Sarah,

    How great it is that you've found someone who will help you with diagnostics! What a nightmare it must have been to have to deal with the meltdowns and problems without knowing what was going on. There's nothing more frustrating than trying every approach in the world and not knowing if it will be remotely effective!

    I have also gained a lot of insight and friendships through the people on this site. I love that they're so warm, caring, funny and are still willing to give you a kick in the pants if you need it! :hammer: :smile:

    I wish I had the airfare to Spain - I'd give that teacher a lesson that he wouldn't forget! :grrr:

    Good luck with the new medications. I really hope he (and you!) get a break from "the chaos that is him".