at the end of the tunnel. I have been hesitant to post as to not jinx ourselves, but we are finally, FINALLY seeing the child we knew all along was inside. For those of you that do not know or remember, we have been dealing with-difficult child's behaviors since the age of 2. The abridged version: Kicked out of 4 daycares, hard time with-peers, authority. 3 weeks hospitalization, a multitude of medication trials, psychiatrists, tdocs and psychologists to no evail. Placed out of district in a therapeutic school in first grade (this year). diagnosis'd with ADHD, Bipolar and ADHD, now most recently Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-Aspergers. As of Jan we have 2 new psychiatrists that agree on the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) and we have in home intensive therapy twice a week. We had a medication change to address anxiety. It's bizarre, it was such a small tweak, but our boy began to emerge. Gone was the constant anger, the fly off the handle, 180°, drop of the hat blistering anger that caused holes in our walls, the hitting, the kicking and the tantruming. He is doing well in school, is earning his points daily, is learning to be safe, comes home and immediately does his homework (spelling, math, writing and reading every day 4 days a week) and he is learning to read. He is more respectful and when he knows he's not, one look from me and I get "sorry".
We are so proud of him. He is actually happy. He's told us he feels better and happier. The past 2 months have been wonderful. I actually find myself looking forward to going home to see him rather than dreading it and hoping for a long business trip in my near future.
I never thought I would see this time. I know it may be fleeting, but for the moment we will enjoy it. It is so nice to hear "he's on a roll", "he's such a good boy" instead of all the negative things we've endured over the years.
I just feel like shouting out. People who have not gone through this have no understanding as to what a moment like this means. The huge weight that is lifted off your shoulders when you no longer have to worry about your phone ringing to come get a difficult child that is out of control or the dread you feel picking up difficult child at daycare because something bad always has happened. The daycares that say "I'm sorry, but he isn't safe. We can't have him here", that causes you to loose your job of 9 plus years. It is just nice to have a feeling of normalcy. NORMAL. I haven't lived a normal life for the last 4 years. Is this really what I am experiencing? If it is, I don't want to go back.
We are so proud of him. He is actually happy. He's told us he feels better and happier. The past 2 months have been wonderful. I actually find myself looking forward to going home to see him rather than dreading it and hoping for a long business trip in my near future.
I never thought I would see this time. I know it may be fleeting, but for the moment we will enjoy it. It is so nice to hear "he's on a roll", "he's such a good boy" instead of all the negative things we've endured over the years.
I just feel like shouting out. People who have not gone through this have no understanding as to what a moment like this means. The huge weight that is lifted off your shoulders when you no longer have to worry about your phone ringing to come get a difficult child that is out of control or the dread you feel picking up difficult child at daycare because something bad always has happened. The daycares that say "I'm sorry, but he isn't safe. We can't have him here", that causes you to loose your job of 9 plus years. It is just nice to have a feeling of normalcy. NORMAL. I haven't lived a normal life for the last 4 years. Is this really what I am experiencing? If it is, I don't want to go back.
