Update on rehab

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by toughlovin, Nov 9, 2010.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Hi all,

    Well it sounds like my son is doing pretty well in rehab although it is really hard to tell because we don't have a lot of communication with him. I am in touch with the therapist and she says he is doing well. I wasn't sure if I should try to stay in touch or kind of back off for awhile. Her thought was I should back off for now because he really needs to work on himself and work on the skill to be independent of us. I totally agree with this so I have been keeping a pretty low profile. He has texted me a few times when he wants something and those interchanges have been pleasant for the most part. It is a little hard in one way not talking to him and getting more detailed information but it also is a good step in me letting go too. I think eventually we will be brought in more but I do think for him in particular part of his journey has to be finding himself, separate from us. Which is what I like about this program they work with individuals and what they need. So I continue to be hopeful..... and it is really really nice to be able to come home to my own house and feel peace and relaxation. I am so so thankful right now that things worked out the way they did.... The process was horrible but at least for now I feel he is in the right place.
  2. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I was hoping you would post an update as I've been thinking about you. It's great that he is working on himself with no distractions. Our counselor told us that our difficult child's should not be callingn us everyday and if they were then they weren't focusing on what they should be, and when they did call we should make it very short and light. Of course I was always wondering how things were really going but since we were up there every Sunday for program we pretty much knew.

    I know exactly how peaceful it is to come home and how good you sleep at night now. It was truly a remarkable feeling. That's when I decided I would never go back to the way things were. I am thrilled that he seems to be accepting the program. The process is ghorrible but in the end it is the best thing that could happen to your family. I remember the day we missed our family reunion because difficult child came home at 4am drunk again and we took he in to be evaluated at an outpatient treatment facility which ultimately led us to her inpatient treatment. It was the worst day of my life, I had not slept and was up all night crying and researching treatment. But I say now that that day was the beginning for us. Without going through that day we would still be living in chaos trying to figure out what to do.

    Your son is doing hard work. He is dealing with emotions and issues that he has buried for a long time. He has been given a gift. I wish him well in his recovery.

  3. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Your post is full of hope..tempered with knowledge that the ball is in his park. I'm glad to read the update and continue to send caring thoughts your way. DDD
  4. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Thank you DDD. It continues to move along. He got a tough letter from my daughter this week and they are doing some processing of that in therapy which is good. We are going to have some kind of phone conference next week. I am just trying to trust the process and the program and let it play out. It is good for me to not try to control the situation but to let others lead the way. I am hopeful though which feels good..... although I also think I am pretty realistic. I keep getting clearer and clearer about my limits about what happens next when it happens.