Update on the Kids

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Hound dog, Oct 20, 2009.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Nichole has been out on her own for a while now. Paying her bills, going to work everyday, trading babysitting off with easy child to try to keep down costs, paying easy child to use her washer and dryer (OMG laudrymats are outragious here!), and buying their food thru anglefood ministries and aldi's. Temp co is so fond of her they told husband she was their best worker and they absolutely love her. She has been seriously considering her relationship with boyfriend. As he continues to act the spoiled brat to the nth degree. Nichole has been having some major positive mature insights into his behavior. So I guess living with someone 24/7 makes it hard to ignore certain behaviors.

    Only downside is this d*mned economy. The factory laid of the first wave of temp workers yesterday. Which means any hope of husband being hired there is nill at the moment. Big boss told Nichole not to worry. She'd be in the very last wave of lay offs. This is typical of this company at this time of year. But no mention of them hiring her as permanent (as they promised) before the lay off hits.

    I don't know what she's going to do once she's laid off. The only income they'll have at that point is the boyfriend's measly 200.00 a month from unemployment. She might qualify for unemployment, but it wouldn't be much. She sounded so ultra sad on the phone last night I could "hear" the worry in her voice.:( I'm sure boyfriend is making her life misearable over this. He was making it miserable before due to the money she was bringing in, I can just imagine the snit he's in with the prospect of next to nothing coming in.:mad: Gawd forbid he go out and get a job. He wants unemployment to continue paying for his school as long as he can milk it. And the idiot boyfriend is still wanting to be the "good guy" with Aubrey and will not do a thing to make her mind. He doesn't take her potty to follow thru with potty training. It's about to drive Nichole out of her mind as he spends the majority of time with Aubrey right now. And she may be sweet as all get out when she wants to be.......but she is going full blown difficult child fast.

    What worries me most with Aubrey is that she seems so lost, sad, and craving affection. When she comes here she wanders around the house. Goes into my "now" livingroom that used to be the bedroom she shared with her Mommy and looks so sad.....while reminding me it used to be her bedroom. She clings to me while here. She loves going to easy child's house. But with one parent expecting her to behave one way and follow one set of rules and the other expecting her to "just know how to behave" and follow a different set of rules while doing nothing but yell at her when she doesn't.......She is so mixed up she doesn't know how she is supposed to behave in any situation. Nichole gets so frustrated that she leaves it to boyfriend to deal with the monster he's created.....which of course just makes it worse.:faint:

    We talked about some of her options. She's going to the other temp agentcies in town, plus Lowes and the like. I hope she can find something until the factory can call her back later. Coming back here is not an option. Not her behavior. Just no way husband and I can do it even if we wanted to. We have zero money. Zero. If unemployment don't get off their fanny soon we're gonna be in mighty big trouble ourselves. As it is, I have to borrow gas money from easy child tonight in order to make it to school this week.

    husband and I wouldn't have survived this long with no money coming in if Nichole and Aubrey were living here.

    So a little prayer, good thoughts, ect for her would be appreciated.

    Travis seems to be doing well at college. Getting to classes, doing the work. Not doing too bad on tests. Still socializing for extra food. lol And heck, they seem to have lots of video game gatherings which I'm sure he really likes. He seems to be doing ok with budgeting his money. Of course not being there I can't really tell for sure, but he's not starving as of yet so my guess is he must be doing ok. lol He watches the sales at the nearby Meijers and buys his food accordingly. Was looking the last time I spoke with him to see if angelfood ministries has a drop off point there in Dayton he can get to.

    He spoke with the HR person at Meijers about a job for the xmas season. The guy said he'd have no problem hiring Travis, but thanks to the economy being in the toilet....seems he was told that this season he has to make do with the employees he has. It's possible he was telling him that to be nice.....but it rings close with what we've been running up against. So the boy's only real hope for a job next quarter is work study.

    He says his roommates tease him cuz he cleans so much. lol So I asked if any of them though to clean the bathrooms. You know 4 guys.....living alone.....yeah, I can only imagine. Yuk. But he said he's been cleaning his as one of the roommates tries not to wake him in the mornings by not flushing the toilet. ewwwwww!:sick:

    He's been having major fatigue issues. And with the blood pressure problem easy child and I were both concerned. His biggest problem is waking up for classes, despite the fact he's using his grandmother's alarm clock that is made to wake the dead. He thinks it's because his room is right in front of the walk way outside......and he can hear everything. So next time one of us make a trip up there we'll be taking his window fan to help drown out the noise.

    With K there has been no more noises about moving over here. As I suspected their wouldn't be when I told her we'd support her but not actively help her. She claims to be looking for apartments there....but doesn't seem to be making any progress....makes me wonder if there really is a church involved helping her or if she was hoping husband and I would jump on her wanting to move back here and offer to bring them over and let them stay. So hard to ever really know with K.

    easy child got the mess straightened out with her mother in law concerning the house messes. Her husband backed her up 100 percent and faced down his mom. Told her if his brother wants the house he and easy child are living in so bad he could go ahead and attempt to sell his house....if it sells before easy child and sister in law are ready to move....his brother and wife could go live at the apartment his mother has been "fixing up" for the past 3 yrs. His mom backed down, told his brother the deal. So easy child and sister in law stay where they are until they're ready to buy their dream home. Which lets them continue to try to get out from under that horrid dept from the loan they co-signed on and got stuck with. Plus gives them a bit of extra funds to sue the person who stuck it to them.

    easy child, of course, is still burning the candle at both ends. But plans to take a year off once she finishes the bachelor program in the fall. (I'll believe it when I see it) But on top of full time work/school.......she also has been training in oncology. ugh I don't know how she doesn't have a nervous breakdown.

    So that's the lowdown on the kiddos. Some good, some bad. But I suppose that's the way it goes.
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Need to add in some good news.

    There was an employee that quit due to a random drug test she didn't want to take. Nichole has worked the line many times. She's also friends with the sister of that line's manager. Her friends sister has placed Nichole on her line. Told her she's now temp-perm and doesn't have to fear the layoffs facing the temp employees.

    Sometimes it pays to live in a small rural area. :)

    Whew! At least for a while. She sounded much releaved when she told me.
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Whew. Sounds like good news for the kids but you need good news.

    Want to add more...lol.

    I am really worried about Aubrey too. She is almost 3 1/2 now and not potty trained because of lack of trying on her parents part. Thats sad. Does idiot boyfriend realize if he would get off his duff and potty train the child she could go to head start and that means more free stuff for the kid? I dont know if your medicaid is doing like our medicaid is doing but ours is cutting out some of the dental on young kids like xrays and sealants for baby teeth. Head Start takes kids to the dentist free. They also take them to the doctor free and some head starts have clothes and shoes for the kids. Its also a breakfast and a lunch you dont have to feed them. Not to mention the education and socialization they get and any testing done for problems.
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2009
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Janet, Nichole has finally taken a stand with the potty training. Seems she's been using panties with Aubrey for more than a week.....Last night was her first nite to sleep in them....and she woke up at 5 am needing to potty. No wet bed. That did it for Nichole. She's making the pull ups they still have disappear and refusing to buy more. boyfriend will either take her potty or clean up the mess from being lazy. lol

    Nichole kept giving up mostly because boyfriend refused to cooperate......else the child would've been broke long ago. Nichole was furious Aubrey couldn't go to Head Start this year or even a reg pre-school simply because she wasn't broke.

    So far.....our welfare has left the kids benefits alone. I'm surprised, but if things don't improve.....ours will most likely do it too.

    Yeah, could use some good news of my own. Had to borrow 20 bucks from Nichole tonight to put gas in my car or I wasn't going to get to school the rest of the week. Gawd I hate that. husband's unemployment check was supposed to have been mailed 2 days ago....we were praying it would get here today. And my fasfa refund should be in the mail.......And of course neither showed up. blah This is getting old fast. Hopefully they'll be here tomorrow.
  5. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    I'm glad that Nichole is taking a stand with boyfriend. Long overdue. And greatly relieved that her job is secure. :whew:

    :bravo: to easy child's husband for taking a stand with his mom.

    As for K. Sigh.... I'm sorry. It has to be so hard with the grandkids so far away and not knowing what is going on. I was hoping she'd make it back so at least the grands would be close and you could keep an eye on them.

  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Way To Go on the potty training! Those cute lil panties are the bomb...lol. Though Im telling you, we go through a ton of them because they are so tiny we lose them. Tony informed me last weekend it was time to buy more because he thinks the ones we have are getting too small on her...lol. I guess they are getting to be too bikini...lmao.