Methuselah
New Member
My husband and I had our meeting with the principal and VP regarding the latter's weird behavior towards difficult child 2--not letting us know difficult child 2 was physically aggressed twice, being overly friendly, and going through her closet and giving my daughter some of her old clothes.
Where to start...I don't know where to start. It was such a mess of CYA, lying and obvious political manuevering. I'll try not to ramble too much...
The VP lied about our conversation regarding the first physical aggression, saying she didn't admit "she dropped the ball and should have called me when it happened"; she now states she told me it takes time to investigate, and that's why I had to contact her 2 1/2 days after it occured. She also lied when I told her my daughter finds it very uncomfortable when she is very friendly and puts her arm aroud her. I told her especially when she sat down with my daughter and her friends at the lunch table, put her arm around and said, "Hey girly-girl, when you coming to my office to talk about T (the chick who kicked her in the back)?" The VP said that didn't happen. She didn''t sit down with her at all. The only time she did that was in the beginning of the year when difficult child 2 was sitting by herself. I told her to stop touching my daughter; she doesn't like it.
Apparently, the VP was pulled into the principal's office and told giving clothes without the parent's permission is wrong, even if given innocently, and to call me and let me know, which she did. difficult child 2 is still whicked out about the clothes.
The VP said to us she gave the clothes, because she saw difficult child 2 without a sweater on a cold day, and that is why she gave her the jean jacket. We told her she is 15 years old and if she walks out of the house without a coat and gets cold, well, she will be more likely to grab one of the multitude of sweaters/hoodies she has to stay warm. By the way, she told difficult child 2 she gave her the jacket because it was "her lucky jacket" not because she didn't think she had one.
She said she investigated the second aggression, but nothing was seen by anyone else, so nothing was done. (The girl who kicked Lily has been in ISS for physical fights before). I told her my daughter thinks the school doesn't care if she is beat on at school, because you never let me know when it happens. I told her I agree. I also told them I would think the school would be smarter about stuff like this, as the district is being sued by parents of a kid who hung himself in the nurse's bathroom because he felt the school didn't care he was being bullied. I actually saw the principal sit up. The principal said we will contact you every time she is in the office, councelling office, etc. I said deal.
The VP stated she isn't giving difficult child 2 any extra attention, staring at her, etc. She said she is in the hall doing her job. We told her the other students don't notice you doing "your job" with other students or other VPs "doing their job" with difficult child 2, but they do with you. She said difficult child 2 was probably saying all of this because she is getting attention from us. (Yep, she said that.) We told her she is icked out by you and came to us for help not attention.
The principal said "I don't want to rehash the past" when I set out to establish a pattern of behavior--not letting us know when she was physically aggressed twice, the VP being overly friendly, and giving her clothes out of her closet. I rehashed anyway. It told her it was important to see our big picture. I told her the big picture makes me go "ooh". She said "it makes YOU go ooh". I said yes, as a PARENT, I go "ooh". It makes my daughter go "ooh".
The principal told us she doesn't change principals or counselors, so we have the same VP. We know we could take it to the school board, but we are going to see what plays out in the following weeks. If difficult child 2 notices a big change, we won't procede.
My husband said the principal is very good at her job, as she acted like every other CEO he has had contacted with when he deals with issues regarding ethics and compliance, his expertise.
The VP lied to our face to cover her butt, so she acted like the idiot she is.
We documented everything. Wrote down everything they said when they said it. We have an a really cool friend who is a hostage negotiator/Lie to Me behavior expert, and he told us how to run the whole meeting. He was a big help. So is this board. Writing all of this has calmed me down.
Where to start...I don't know where to start. It was such a mess of CYA, lying and obvious political manuevering. I'll try not to ramble too much...
The VP lied about our conversation regarding the first physical aggression, saying she didn't admit "she dropped the ball and should have called me when it happened"; she now states she told me it takes time to investigate, and that's why I had to contact her 2 1/2 days after it occured. She also lied when I told her my daughter finds it very uncomfortable when she is very friendly and puts her arm aroud her. I told her especially when she sat down with my daughter and her friends at the lunch table, put her arm around and said, "Hey girly-girl, when you coming to my office to talk about T (the chick who kicked her in the back)?" The VP said that didn't happen. She didn''t sit down with her at all. The only time she did that was in the beginning of the year when difficult child 2 was sitting by herself. I told her to stop touching my daughter; she doesn't like it.
Apparently, the VP was pulled into the principal's office and told giving clothes without the parent's permission is wrong, even if given innocently, and to call me and let me know, which she did. difficult child 2 is still whicked out about the clothes.
The VP said to us she gave the clothes, because she saw difficult child 2 without a sweater on a cold day, and that is why she gave her the jean jacket. We told her she is 15 years old and if she walks out of the house without a coat and gets cold, well, she will be more likely to grab one of the multitude of sweaters/hoodies she has to stay warm. By the way, she told difficult child 2 she gave her the jacket because it was "her lucky jacket" not because she didn't think she had one.
She said she investigated the second aggression, but nothing was seen by anyone else, so nothing was done. (The girl who kicked Lily has been in ISS for physical fights before). I told her my daughter thinks the school doesn't care if she is beat on at school, because you never let me know when it happens. I told her I agree. I also told them I would think the school would be smarter about stuff like this, as the district is being sued by parents of a kid who hung himself in the nurse's bathroom because he felt the school didn't care he was being bullied. I actually saw the principal sit up. The principal said we will contact you every time she is in the office, councelling office, etc. I said deal.
The VP stated she isn't giving difficult child 2 any extra attention, staring at her, etc. She said she is in the hall doing her job. We told her the other students don't notice you doing "your job" with other students or other VPs "doing their job" with difficult child 2, but they do with you. She said difficult child 2 was probably saying all of this because she is getting attention from us. (Yep, she said that.) We told her she is icked out by you and came to us for help not attention.
The principal said "I don't want to rehash the past" when I set out to establish a pattern of behavior--not letting us know when she was physically aggressed twice, the VP being overly friendly, and giving her clothes out of her closet. I rehashed anyway. It told her it was important to see our big picture. I told her the big picture makes me go "ooh". She said "it makes YOU go ooh". I said yes, as a PARENT, I go "ooh". It makes my daughter go "ooh".
The principal told us she doesn't change principals or counselors, so we have the same VP. We know we could take it to the school board, but we are going to see what plays out in the following weeks. If difficult child 2 notices a big change, we won't procede.
My husband said the principal is very good at her job, as she acted like every other CEO he has had contacted with when he deals with issues regarding ethics and compliance, his expertise.
The VP lied to our face to cover her butt, so she acted like the idiot she is.
We documented everything. Wrote down everything they said when they said it. We have an a really cool friend who is a hostage negotiator/Lie to Me behavior expert, and he told us how to run the whole meeting. He was a big help. So is this board. Writing all of this has calmed me down.
