When my son's phone number rings, I freeze. He became incensed when I wouldn't use the $400 rent money I promised him for a Christmas gift for driving tickets. Verbal abuse, blaming, the c and b words, told me never to come back to his town or he would slit my tires, shaming, spitting on my car, and more. I blocked my cell number, but can't block home phone. It's been a month, and the phone rang. No message. I did not pick up and don't want to see or talk to him. My immediate thinking: he's sorry, he's desperate, he has no one, he needs help. Then: he wants money, he'll manipulate me, I'll cave. But, bravo. I refuse to answer. I will not allow myself to be treated horribly. If he want to make amends, he can write a letter. Any real change is a long, long way off. This is hard, but I am done. Sometimes I am afraid, but I am done. Sometimes I am heartbroken, but I am done. Change is possible for me. Change may or may not be possible for my son, but it is out of my hands, but until my son treats me with respect, I am done.