Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by AmericanGirl, Apr 26, 2013.

  1. AmericanGirl

    AmericanGirl Member

    Been a long two weeks since I showed difficult child the door.

    he asked me to come meet his roommate. Guy only had 5 minutes notice so I was surprised to find a basically clean and orderly house. He has lives there for 5 years. Had the same job about that long. Will graduate in 3 terms.

    took difficult child to apply for food stamps. He wanted me to come in - in case he didn't know answers. Nope. He is approved til end of May and then needs paperwork finished to get 6 months.

    difficult child has part time job at fast food. Turns full time in about a week. Asked to go to school in may to take one class. Long story, but it required zero cash and will actually generate about $700 to me.

    i say okay. I will buy book. I will pay your $300 rent for May.

    difficult child will make an a or b. you will pay half utilities and all your personal expenses.

    difficult child asked me to but him cheap car....one I wouldn't worry about. Lolololol. I didn't laugh but I did say it isn't time.

    difficult child asked for cell phone. Told him he needed to take care of that himself.

    happier he is out of this house. Unbelievable the stress they put on you. Trying to be polite yet detached.

    The best thing I have learned is this --- difficult child's emergency is NOT mine. Same goes for his wishes and dreams.

    he is capable. I've been basically on my own since I was 17. Put myself through college and grad school. difficult child can figure it out.
  2. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It sounds like he is taking some baby steps AG. You are doing great with setting your boundaries. I hope he keeps moving forward. His roommate sounds much better than any of my difficult child's roommates.
  3. Zardo

    Zardo Member

    You're doing great and it sounds like he is on his way. Stay connected while you stay detached as it sounds like he craves your approval when he is doing the right thing. Sounds like he has found someone that is quietly showing him how he can live and difficult child is finding inspiration to figure out a plan for himself and taking those steps to live a better life. Hoping he finds the ability to continue on this path.