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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 681412" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>You know, for me, the site allows me to divest some of my armor. I do not want to define myself or be defined in my relationship with my son, by my armor, but by my love.</p><p></p><p>I have been trying to find another way to love, that allows me to be more permeable, less defended. So far, not so good.</p><p></p><p>I am seeing that the love itself is not the problem. It is other things: like fear, like guilt, like obligation, enmeshment that are the problem and that must be why it is so much harder when he is near.</p><p></p><p>Back to the drawing board.</p><p></p><p>How to let go of the burdens of should, of future-thinking, that seems to be the key for me.</p><p></p><p>It has been so good to hear from you Albatross. I hope you will keep us posted. I am glad to know you are here. And well.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 681412, member: 18958"] You know, for me, the site allows me to divest some of my armor. I do not want to define myself or be defined in my relationship with my son, by my armor, but by my love. I have been trying to find another way to love, that allows me to be more permeable, less defended. So far, not so good. I am seeing that the love itself is not the problem. It is other things: like fear, like guilt, like obligation, enmeshment that are the problem and that must be why it is so much harder when he is near. Back to the drawing board. How to let go of the burdens of should, of future-thinking, that seems to be the key for me. It has been so good to hear from you Albatross. I hope you will keep us posted. I am glad to know you are here. And well. COPA [/QUOTE]
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