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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 709523" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Just a thought. I dont know anything about how to get healthcare in the UK, buf if you can do it, in my opinion family counseling could save your family. Otherwise you really have two families. And a marriage with secrets is not much of a marriage. You are allowing your son to disrupt the relationships with people you love who have probably treated you a lot better than Son has and does. If you dont get on the same page, even though you may not be 100% comfortable with what you and husband decide to do, it could save your family.</p><p></p><p>Your son is a man behaving badly and you are probably thinking of that cute little ten year old boy that once adored you. But he is a man now...tall, muscles, deep voice, facial hair...and you are a mother/friend now, not a doting mommy who can kiss it and make him better.</p><p></p><p>Your husband is your mate, confidante and beloved (hopefully) and he will be there for you for the rest of your life. Your son wont. He isnt going to be there for you. To me, it is wonderful to nurture a marriage over childish, destructive grown children and their deliberate struggles. Your other children in my opinion should not have a part in how you and husband decide to deal or not deal with Son.</p><p></p><p>I personally feel your husband has the better viewpoint. But others may agree with you. You cant have it both ways. And your husband in my opinion should know what you are doing which is why I suggested family counseling. If Son wont go too, leave him out of it.</p><p></p><p>Hugs and take care of YOU! You need to nurture yourself and your marriage in my opinion.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 709523, member: 1550"] Just a thought. I dont know anything about how to get healthcare in the UK, buf if you can do it, in my opinion family counseling could save your family. Otherwise you really have two families. And a marriage with secrets is not much of a marriage. You are allowing your son to disrupt the relationships with people you love who have probably treated you a lot better than Son has and does. If you dont get on the same page, even though you may not be 100% comfortable with what you and husband decide to do, it could save your family. Your son is a man behaving badly and you are probably thinking of that cute little ten year old boy that once adored you. But he is a man now...tall, muscles, deep voice, facial hair...and you are a mother/friend now, not a doting mommy who can kiss it and make him better. Your husband is your mate, confidante and beloved (hopefully) and he will be there for you for the rest of your life. Your son wont. He isnt going to be there for you. To me, it is wonderful to nurture a marriage over childish, destructive grown children and their deliberate struggles. Your other children in my opinion should not have a part in how you and husband decide to deal or not deal with Son. I personally feel your husband has the better viewpoint. But others may agree with you. You cant have it both ways. And your husband in my opinion should know what you are doing which is why I suggested family counseling. If Son wont go too, leave him out of it. Hugs and take care of YOU! You need to nurture yourself and your marriage in my opinion. [/QUOTE]
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