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upset with teacher.
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 28843" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I've even had a school counsellor come out with similar stuff with difficult child 3. The thing is, we work really hard as parents to help our kids overcome their hurdles, and then when we succeed, even in part - we get disbelief that there ever has been anything wrong with them! difficult child 3's school counsellor said, after she had seen his progress from a non-verbal, disruptive, jargon-uttering five year old to a much more capable and fluent nine-year-old, "difficult child 3 is doing so well now, when you look out on the playground he's just like any other normal kid. Isn't it great that he is no longer autistic?"</p><p>I reminded her of difficult child 3's own statement about himself the year before, "I'm getting better at pretending to be normal."</p><p></p><p>A serious suggestion - emphasise the value of acknowledging his HISTORY. In difficult child 3's case, his HISTORY of language delay will always be the reason that his diagnosis is autism, not Asperger's.</p><p></p><p>And an analogy for you to share with his teacher - consider a regal, serene swan gliding on the lake. It looks so effortless, such an image of tranquility. But if you look beneath, you will see a lot of furious activity is really going on just to preserve that facade of ease.</p><p>It's the same with our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids, especially the brighter ones - they use a lot of energy in adapting to their disability. Just because they can assume a veneer of normality doesn't mean it's as easy for them as for the next kid. It's not. And when things get tough or the wheels fall of whatever you have in place to support them, it's people like that teacher and difficult child 3's school counsellor who are taken by surprise. Just because a kid seems to be doing well is no reason to throw them in the deep end or remove support - they're doing well BECAUSE things are working for them, just as they are. IF IT AIN'T BROKE, DON'T FIX IT!!</p><p></p><p>But do remember to thank the teacher for thinking so well of your darling boy. Her failure to recognise his disability is a positive testament to your efforts as a Warrior Mum and your son's effort to assume a semblance of normality. Clearly, he is succeeding. So are you. And she does care about him, it's not her fault if she never knew him when things were bad.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 28843, member: 1991"] I've even had a school counsellor come out with similar stuff with difficult child 3. The thing is, we work really hard as parents to help our kids overcome their hurdles, and then when we succeed, even in part - we get disbelief that there ever has been anything wrong with them! difficult child 3's school counsellor said, after she had seen his progress from a non-verbal, disruptive, jargon-uttering five year old to a much more capable and fluent nine-year-old, "difficult child 3 is doing so well now, when you look out on the playground he's just like any other normal kid. Isn't it great that he is no longer autistic?" I reminded her of difficult child 3's own statement about himself the year before, "I'm getting better at pretending to be normal." A serious suggestion - emphasise the value of acknowledging his HISTORY. In difficult child 3's case, his HISTORY of language delay will always be the reason that his diagnosis is autism, not Asperger's. And an analogy for you to share with his teacher - consider a regal, serene swan gliding on the lake. It looks so effortless, such an image of tranquility. But if you look beneath, you will see a lot of furious activity is really going on just to preserve that facade of ease. It's the same with our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids, especially the brighter ones - they use a lot of energy in adapting to their disability. Just because they can assume a veneer of normality doesn't mean it's as easy for them as for the next kid. It's not. And when things get tough or the wheels fall of whatever you have in place to support them, it's people like that teacher and difficult child 3's school counsellor who are taken by surprise. Just because a kid seems to be doing well is no reason to throw them in the deep end or remove support - they're doing well BECAUSE things are working for them, just as they are. IF IT AIN'T BROKE, DON'T FIX IT!! But do remember to thank the teacher for thinking so well of your darling boy. Her failure to recognise his disability is a positive testament to your efforts as a Warrior Mum and your son's effort to assume a semblance of normality. Clearly, he is succeeding. So are you. And she does care about him, it's not her fault if she never knew him when things were bad. Marg [/QUOTE]
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