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Parent Emeritus
Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 640182" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Oh, I think a difficult child trait is a standing philosophy of "I can't." I am too frustrated these days to give difficult child advice. It's like talking to the air. He acts very interested while I'm talking then never does what I said because "It won't work." "I can't." "It's too far away." "It's not feasible." Blah, blah, blah.</p><p></p><p>An example is I spent my day off calling Missouri psychologists because he claimed he'd go for help if I could find any that were open after work hours. Well, I found several and some took his phone number. I asked him if anyone called him and he said, "I can't afford it" which is different from "I don't have the time." If one problem is solved, there is another problem he invents. He can certainly afford it if he can buy video systems and their expensive accessories the minute they come out. Recently he purchased a top-of-the-line 60 inch smart television. I saw it on Skype. It's enormous. Must have cost him a mint. He spends thousands on these things, but then can't go for therapy just because of a co-pay. Like most difficult children, his priorities are screwed up. He is always broke on a very good salary, and it's because he has that "gotta have it NOW" difficult child syndrome. I do give him credit for working, but he does nothing to help himself and is constantly in angst.</p><p></p><p>I am getting irritated just talking about it so...hey, Lil and Jabby, I know the frustration. So now I just listen and say "uh huh" "ok" "Yes" and very little else. I refuse advice by saying "You are a capable man and know what works best for you. I don't." Period. Sometimes that makes him hang up on me but, since I no longer care if he does that...oh, well. Life goes on.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 640182, member: 1550"] Oh, I think a difficult child trait is a standing philosophy of "I can't." I am too frustrated these days to give difficult child advice. It's like talking to the air. He acts very interested while I'm talking then never does what I said because "It won't work." "I can't." "It's too far away." "It's not feasible." Blah, blah, blah. An example is I spent my day off calling Missouri psychologists because he claimed he'd go for help if I could find any that were open after work hours. Well, I found several and some took his phone number. I asked him if anyone called him and he said, "I can't afford it" which is different from "I don't have the time." If one problem is solved, there is another problem he invents. He can certainly afford it if he can buy video systems and their expensive accessories the minute they come out. Recently he purchased a top-of-the-line 60 inch smart television. I saw it on Skype. It's enormous. Must have cost him a mint. He spends thousands on these things, but then can't go for therapy just because of a co-pay. Like most difficult children, his priorities are screwed up. He is always broke on a very good salary, and it's because he has that "gotta have it NOW" difficult child syndrome. I do give him credit for working, but he does nothing to help himself and is constantly in angst. I am getting irritated just talking about it so...hey, Lil and Jabby, I know the frustration. So now I just listen and say "uh huh" "ok" "Yes" and very little else. I refuse advice by saying "You are a capable man and know what works best for you. I don't." Period. Sometimes that makes him hang up on me but, since I no longer care if he does that...oh, well. Life goes on. [/QUOTE]
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Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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