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Very scared
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<blockquote data-quote="2much2recover" data-source="post: 648010" data-attributes="member: 18366"><p>These are the realistic "shoulds". I like this: avoid the would've, could've should'ves". Those are the things that keep us stuck doing the wrong things under feelings of obligation that "should've" ended long ago. The fact is the things you did for your selves recently are the kind of things you "should" be doing. You have a RIGHT to live a normal life and enjoy yourselves. It is important to accept that you "would've or "could've" done something but that "would've" only put a bandage on an ongoing problem - no change for the long term. "Could've" helped, sure and the cow "could've" flown over the moon. What I hear you saying is that you can no longer continue to bail out your son - you are free to stop doing so and I congratulate you on taking the first steps in doing so. Think of all the "would've, could've, should'ves" you could have done with all that money you have wasted on your son trying to help him in the past. Oh if you "could've" have all that money back - because spending it didn't change his life one iota! He "should've" had his life together a long time ago if he "would've" valued any of the help you have given him over the years. You "should've" cut him off long ago - but now through painful growth, you are ready to, so BRAVO!</p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/staystrong.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":staystrong:" title="staystrong :staystrong:" data-shortname=":staystrong:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="2much2recover, post: 648010, member: 18366"] These are the realistic "shoulds". I like this: avoid the would've, could've should'ves". Those are the things that keep us stuck doing the wrong things under feelings of obligation that "should've" ended long ago. The fact is the things you did for your selves recently are the kind of things you "should" be doing. You have a RIGHT to live a normal life and enjoy yourselves. It is important to accept that you "would've or "could've" done something but that "would've" only put a bandage on an ongoing problem - no change for the long term. "Could've" helped, sure and the cow "could've" flown over the moon. What I hear you saying is that you can no longer continue to bail out your son - you are free to stop doing so and I congratulate you on taking the first steps in doing so. Think of all the "would've, could've, should'ves" you could have done with all that money you have wasted on your son trying to help him in the past. Oh if you "could've" have all that money back - because spending it didn't change his life one iota! He "should've" had his life together a long time ago if he "would've" valued any of the help you have given him over the years. You "should've" cut him off long ago - but now through painful growth, you are ready to, so BRAVO! :staystrong: [/QUOTE]
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