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Victimhood / Martyrdom vs Boundaries
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 636560" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>I forgot to add this part, about the education thing. I wondered why I put all that stuff in about the money, or about the number of times we had tried.</p><p></p><p>Chain of consciousness being what it is, I left those parts in.</p><p></p><p>Those are the guilty, shamed, defensive parts of me trying to justify that we did try.</p><p></p><p>difficult child is rabid about that $3000 student loan he was then required to repay.</p><p></p><p>Which he didn't repay.</p><p></p><p>And neither did we.</p><p></p><p>And I do feel a vulnerability around that issue.</p><p></p><p>What does anyone think about that?</p><p></p><p>difficult child contention is that we ruined things for him because when he was finally ready to try school again, he couldn't go until that old loan, now much more than the $ he actually got to use, still needed to be paid back and we wouldn't help.</p><p></p><p>Vulnerability, for me, there.</p><p></p><p>Maybe he is right.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 636560, member: 17461"] I forgot to add this part, about the education thing. I wondered why I put all that stuff in about the money, or about the number of times we had tried. Chain of consciousness being what it is, I left those parts in. Those are the guilty, shamed, defensive parts of me trying to justify that we did try. difficult child is rabid about that $3000 student loan he was then required to repay. Which he didn't repay. And neither did we. And I do feel a vulnerability around that issue. What does anyone think about that? difficult child contention is that we ruined things for him because when he was finally ready to try school again, he couldn't go until that old loan, now much more than the $ he actually got to use, still needed to be paid back and we wouldn't help. Vulnerability, for me, there. Maybe he is right. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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