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Substance Abuse
Waiting for the shoe to drop...
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<blockquote data-quote="ColleenB" data-source="post: 701618" data-attributes="member: 19887"><p>I hear you Darkwing... and I agree. Which is why I am waiting for the worst.... </p><p></p><p>I personally don't think he can drink or smoke pot recreationally, but he doesn't listen to me, and I'm tired. </p><p></p><p>For now I am stepping back, and giving him space. It's as much for me, to keep me sane in this whole mess. </p><p></p><p>I actually called him yesterday, and his voicemail was horrible... he was drunk and I immediately reacted in my gut.... I cried and felt like I was falling in the ditch again, in the hole that swallows me up when u let it. </p><p></p><p>I contacted him and let him know about the voicemail. He did change it. But I heard it. I heard the addicts voice again.... the anger, the pain.</p><p></p><p>I'm trying to understand addiction, and the extreme self hate that comes with it.... I'm trying to love him and give him knowledge that he is worth fighting the addiction for. I think for a long time I've been so sad and hurt I've forgotten how to just love him regardless. </p><p></p><p>I'm trying to do that now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ColleenB, post: 701618, member: 19887"] I hear you Darkwing... and I agree. Which is why I am waiting for the worst.... I personally don't think he can drink or smoke pot recreationally, but he doesn't listen to me, and I'm tired. For now I am stepping back, and giving him space. It's as much for me, to keep me sane in this whole mess. I actually called him yesterday, and his voicemail was horrible... he was drunk and I immediately reacted in my gut.... I cried and felt like I was falling in the ditch again, in the hole that swallows me up when u let it. I contacted him and let him know about the voicemail. He did change it. But I heard it. I heard the addicts voice again.... the anger, the pain. I'm trying to understand addiction, and the extreme self hate that comes with it.... I'm trying to love him and give him knowledge that he is worth fighting the addiction for. I think for a long time I've been so sad and hurt I've forgotten how to just love him regardless. I'm trying to do that now. [/QUOTE]
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Waiting for the shoe to drop...
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