Warning for those with home security systems...

Star*

call 911........call 911
I still remember the kids down the dirt road - two of them - one about 9 years old but the size of a Sumo wrestler and his little cousin age 5 or so.

In the Summer I hardly ever rolled up my truck windows. But when I worked construction I always had change in the console from the week, and never took it out. So each weekend - I'd go out and - amazing! Change gone. So this went on about 3-4 weekends in a row. Dude would do a lot of things but taking change was not on his agenda. So I suspected the drunk guy walking down the street. So I set out one weekend to 'catch a theif' and AH HA! - I see the two kids from down the road. It was almost comical - because here is the 9 year old boosting the 4 year old cousin INTO the window of my truck to get the change by his feet, hanging in the window and then handing the change backwards to the big kid and he puts it in his pocket.

So I sneak out the front door and stand behind them and I'm standing there when they turn around and I said "HEY! Whatta ya doing?" and he said "NOTHING!" I said "LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE STEALING CHANGE OUTTA MY TRUCK? BEEN DOING THIS FOR A WHILE?" "No!" (very defensively) then nothing was said and then the older one says "It's not breaking and then entering if we don't open the door or break a window."

It was almost too cute - DF and I were both standing there trying not to laugh. I mean he had a point - if you boost your cousin 'through' an open window - it's not breaking AND then then entering.".
 
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HaoZi

Guest
From this month's Reader's Digest:
When a neighbor's home was burgled, I decided to be more safety conscious. But my measly front-door lock wasn't going to stop anyone, so I hung this sign outside: "Nancy, don't come in. The snake is loose. Mom."
^I would so do that. But I would really get a snake first.
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
Mine usually were.........ROFL. My Mom only visited once. My 8' rainbow boa - was wrapped around the chain hiding in my pothos on the ceiling. So my Mom finally FINALLY came to my apartment when I was 16. I was so excited. She made it past the bird room - I had a McCaw, a yellow front amazon, a congo, an african, and babysat a very noisy cockatoo. I had 3 aquariums (I showed fish at that time) and I had a pet skunk. On the other end of my home I had my beloved 9' python and my boa. Today was the boa's turn to be out. I put the security gate up and let her out. Well here comes my Mom. Up the steps, in the house - greeted by my skunk - (she was thrilled) - then down the hall standing in the door way - and as I tried to tell her to move - stubborn as she was - BJ the boa descended slowly - ever so slowy - Insisting Mom come and sit - she refused - and BJ made her way down the potted plant to kiss my Mom right on top of her head with a loving "MWAH' and well suffice to say - it was the very last time my Mom ever visited.
Dad said he was sure he could hear her scream 3 miles away. Just wasn't sure what the noise was exactly. But it sure sounded like Mom.

I took her one night and left her on the front seat of my car while I ran in for pizza - car was running. Some kids thought they'd be funny and opened the door like they were going to steal my car. One of them even made a motion like he was getting in my car - (they weren't really going to steal it - just playing) and I stood in the pizza parlor looking out while the owner said "Hey those kids are trying to steal your car." I said - "Never going to happen." About that time the kid in the drivers seat waved and I pretended to be shocked, then waved and pointed to the passenger seat and he looked and then I pointed again and made a snake with my forearm and the kid was still laughing and I shrugged and about that time he's laughing acting like he's going to shut the door and back out and I laughed....and about that time - I see this kid FREAK out - and now he can't find the door handle - and I'm standing there at the side of my car using my hip to hold the door closed and BJ is all over him and he's paralyzed in the seat screaming - OMG it was hysterical and the pizza guy is standing outside watching this kid inside my car screaming -
LET ME OUT, aaahhhhhhh and so I opened the door and grabbed my snake and the kid is literally laying on the ground. His buddies were laughing, the pizza guy was laughing, I put BJ back in the car - I'm laughing and the kid is finally standing up - with tears running down his face yelling THATS NOT FUNNY - crying now. The pizza guy said "Bet you never try to steal another car again you jerk." Yeah that was about the best anti-theft boa in the world. She was a hisser........Pretty sure he pp'd on himself too. So I know for a fact the snake works.
 
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HaoZi

Guest
I used to know guys down south that would catch rattlesnakes and toss them in the toolboxes on their trucks when they were having problems with tools disappearing.
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
My first day on the construction job? The supervisor was this huge, but super-funny guy that acutally had venomous snakes that he milked for different places (legally) and sold the venom for anti-venom mfg. Neat guy - we got along great from the start - because -----on my first day I was delivering fuel and supplies and he said "Hey Star, will you get in the back of my truck, in my toolbox and get me a pipe wrench?." I thought okay whatever - and I walked back down the site, about 30 yards and opened the toolbox and he had shut off the trackhoe, and his crew of about 5 guys all just seemed to be taking a break. Never occured to me that they were watching me for any particular reason, maybe to see if I knew what a pipe wrench was. So I opened the box and there was about a 6' black snake - maybe 8' right next to the pipe wrench. It did startle me, but not much so I grabbed it, then the wrench and yelled up the hill - "GOT IT, ......what do you want me to do with THIS?" and jumped down out of the truck and walked back over to him, handed him the wrench and said "I found it - I get to keep him...I love snakes." and he just looked at me and he radioed someone and said 'NEGATORY - she's a keeper.' I of course, had to put the snake back in his cage in the truck, but after that OMG it was on....for 3 years we pulled some lu-lu's - we even buried a cheatin guys truck. most fun I ever had at a job. We did see a few real rattlers - but most times if you just left them alone they'd leave. The guy that collected them did catch one that wouldn't leave one of our sites, and keep it - he was HUGE - 9' long and my hands wouldn't fit around his body. But just beautiful markings. Those things you don't play with. I guess that would stop tools from disappearing.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
Ugh you guys and snakes just give me the willies!

I did have a 4 and a half foot Iguana that was the best social worker repellent ever invented though. We let her have the run of the house and one of her favorite places to sit was on top of the curtain rods right above the couch that faced the front door. When people came to the door they would see this thing laying on the top of the curtain rod and assume it was a stuffed animal and make a comment...then she would slowly turn her head and bob it up and down and maybe stick her tongue out...and that was it...social workers couldnt move down the steps fast enough. From then on, the first question when they entered my yard was "do you still have that thing? Ok, well, everything ok? Good, bye!" LOL.
 

GoingNorth

Crazy Cat Lady
Sounds like a really gorgeous theft and nosey people repellent, Janet. I love iggies. My theft repellent weighs 95lbs, has big pointy ears and lots of very visible, sharp teeth.

German Shepherds are very good at home security. He's funny because he'll eat an uninvited visitor, but if I let you in, he's all over you friendly.

Up where I live I get a lot of prosyletizers from the more fringe churches. They tend to show up early Sat. AM and I am NOT a morning person by any means.

Something about opening the door holding a snarling dog like that by the collar tends to cause them to drop their tracts and flee without a word.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
I am not even awake in the mornings! I think they have my charts all marked somewhere not to come near my house before 11 am because one morning the power guy showed up at around 8 am and I answered the door in nothing but a short tee shirt and nothing else. No undies or anything! I hadnt gotten to sleep till around 5 and simply wasnt awake enough to know anything. LOL. Poor man couldnt get out of there fast enough before saying he would be back later that afternoon. I didnt have a clue why till I woke up later and realized how I was dressed.
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
WOW - on our utilities contracts we had to send notarized statements in that say VICIOUS DOGS

Wonder what it says on Janets utilities contract - NO PANTIES WEDNESDAYS?
 
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