"We don't drug test, we just do UA's."

comatheart

Active Member
The transitional living program my son went to after rehab focuses on mental health. They don't focus on the addiction side and instead refer out for that piece. We got him signed up for a screening at an outpatient addiction center when he was home on a pass several weeks ago. My son signed a release that day allowing them to speak to me since he's 18 now.

Since then, they refuse to speak with me or give me any information. Its been awful dealing with them. Even when I called to ask general questions like "Do you random drug test?" I was told.... "No, we dont drug test, we only do UA's." No joke. They seem completely incompetent. I had to ask what exactly they were looking for in a persons urine analysis (UA) then if they dont drug test? She had no clue and had to go ask only to come back and tell me they dont actually do UA's either. It was insane!

I finally got the name of a contact higher up and spoke with him about my issues.

He was helpful in confirming my son did sign consent and told me his treatment plan (that he admitted isnt being followed) yet he was less than friendly towards me.

I explained to him that my son wouldn't be at his appointment there on Monday and that's why I hoped to talk to the counselor.... as soon as we got off the phone this guy turned around and called my son & told him that I had cxl his appointment Monday!!! Even after I explained WHY he wont be there (we're taking him to the psychiatrist for a random drug test because he needs that accountability and NO ONE ELSE is doing it!) So difficult child turns and asks me why I cxl his appointment!? I couldnt lie to his face, so now he knows. Ugh!!!!!!!!!

The man at this addiction outpatient center told me the state (OK) frowns on random drug testing on addicts. He was absolutely shocked our psychiatrist does it and took her name down. I didn't think anything about it at the time, but now I'm worried hes going to try and get her in trouble!

Have you EVER heard of random drug testing being frowned upon for addicts in recovery???

I'm not sure I even want difficult child participating there now. (Obviously i realize its not up to me) Just because he turned 18 doesnt mean he suddenly knows what's best for him and these people as a whole seem to be completely incompetent. They certainly arent helping families by turning them on each other like this! I can understand if mommy was trying to be involved in his aftercare and he was 35... but hes 18!

I hope and pray he really is clean, but my gut says he's not and it hasn't been wrong yet.

My son isnt mad he's going to his Psychiatrist Monday, but I assure you he'll pass that test. Always does when he knows it's coming. Now I have this center that's supposed to help him stay clean to thank for that.

Relapses are part of recovery right? But a relapse that isnt addressed, turns into something much bigger. You get past the point of no return.

I'm so frustrated.
 

toughlovin

Well-Known Member
Ugh.... I think the whole privacy thing with 18 year olds is nuts! My guess is they want to try and keep their relationship with your son honest and since they are 18 they are letting him know you called. A part of me can understand that but then they need to totally tell you that up front... and to be honest I dont think I have ever had a place do that to me, unless I didnt know it.

And I think every addiction program my son has ever been in did random drug tests? I mean really that is a way to help ensure people are staying clean (although yes there are ways around the tests but it is harder if they are random). Even the places that were not totally random they did them often enough that it would be hard to keep getting around them though I am sure people did.

So yeah this does not sound great.

Darn this is such a frustrating system we have.

TL
 

Kathy813

Well-Known Member
Staff member
My difficult child has been drug and alcohol tested in every treatment program and halfway house she has been in. Also, even though she is 29 now, once she signed a release no one has ever acted like we shouldn't be involved in her treatment plan. In fact, most pushed us to participate more than we wanted to at times.

I don't like the sound of the place!

~Kathy
 

dayatatime

Member
My son was almost taken into one place (in the end it didn't go through) where they, I believe, did do testing, but put zero stock in it, even though it was random. Their opinion was that it was just not reliable-- too much of a false read because addicts are too crafty.

That said, do you have a case manger or PO or even your therapist who can contact the place and try to sort things out? Or, can you turn the tables on them -- this is the issue x,y,z (as succinctly as possible and just the facts; even if a fact is I'm not feeling including) what can we do about it?

I'm really sorry that situation is hard. This is a path of challenge after challenge. ….but boy have I had plenty of opportunities to improve my communication skills and personal emotional regulation skills….
 
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