Well THAT Didn't Work...

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
The soapbox is gonna get crowded... I have only one problem with the creative solutions Susie mentioned... I don't come up with that stuff on my own!!!
 

susiestar

Roll With It
Step, it doesn't matter who comes up with them. What matters is that you implement them.

One of the things I LOVE about Love and Logic is that it does NOT say that the punishment must be immediate or the child won't be able to associate the punishment with the wrong action. It isn't said so much in the books that I have read, but it sure was stressed in the 1 day seminar that I took. Dr. Fay Sr said that it is vastly better to come up with a plan, and then take a few days to talk it over with friends, therapist, etc... to work out the kinks and wrinkles that a difficult child would come up iwth. He compared it to a boat, saying it is better to keep it in dry dock an extra couple of days while you have other people help you find the holes so that those holes are plugged before the kid can begin to find them.

Feel free to use any of those things that I mentioned.
 
H

HaoZi

Guest
Dad's solution to such an issue with me? Drop off and pick up point at the mall was the same. Every time, without fail, it was the same place. No excuses for forgetting where. Forgetting when... that was something else when it wasn't the "usual time".
 

susiestar

Roll With It
My father's solution? Move us to a town where the nearest mall was 90 min away. He didn't go to malls. Not for me, anyway.

I do remember asking for a ride to the pool once or twice. He laughed. Wanted to know why I wanted a ride to go exercise. Never did get that ride to the pool from him, lol. He was usually pretty funny about it, managed to make some sort of joke about it. One friend was SURE she could get him to give us a ride to the pool at the Y. She gave it a real good try, and by the time she realized he said no we were halfway to the pool. On foot.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
we went to the mall. Never remember it being a problem. Normally one parent drove and another picked up until we could drive.

As far As far as keeping them occupied, do any of you live near farms? Especially tobacco farms? They usually hire teens to work the fields and it is hard hot labor. My boys did it from around 10 or 11 years old and Tony was working in the fields since since he was a preschooler.
 

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
:rofl: oh Janet!!! We have to pester Jett to go outside at all... Even when it's nice... And Onyxx is allergic to hard work... LOL!
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
Well ya'll can share that soapbox on my ISLAND -

WELCOME - to FANSTASY island......cause when I hit the lotto? I'm buying that island....and I'm calling it Gilligians Teen Get Away - I'm breeding sharks in captivity as we speak - nasty, mean - teen, pheremone difficult child 1 UP - driven sharks.....(chomp, chomp, chomp) and We'll start with

WELCOME TO HEAVEN - TEEN REFORM ISLAND -

Lesson #1 -

Appreciating what your parents did seminar = All the island leaves are coated with poison ivy
a.) How to earn your 1 bark encrusted roll of toilet tissue -
1.) being on time for beach clean up meeting at 12:00 AM

Lesson #2 - (to follow IMMEDIATELY 12:01 AM)

Not complaining while you are doing the above - Putting on a smile when you are miserable for real
b.) Giving back the bark encrusted roll of toilet tissue for complaining -
2.) learning how not to lie when asked "were you complaining?"
 

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
Lesson #3 -

How to speak appropriately at all times, even when you don't feel like it
Part 1: That snotty tone of voice doesn't ever work
Part 2: Yelling at people when they did nothing wrong will not get you anywhere
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
well step we were really poor and if the boys wanted anything at all other than food and second hand clothes, they figured out fast that they better accept the chance to work in the summer if we could find them a job in the tobacco field. That was the only way they were going to get any name brand stuff. Plus mine did like to work. Its boring in the summer.
 

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
Oh, we don't have a lot of money. And when they lived with BM and Grandma A, they had even less (BM had them on food stamps and medicaid)... But they wore Abercrombie, Victoria's Secret (GRRRRR) and other expensive stuff, and she actually complained in court (a month ago) that we "sent them home in rags"! Just 'cause I shop at JC Penney and Sears... And undies come from KMart, Wally World, etc. - !

Gonna post another thread about this weekend... LOL I don't want to hijack this one.
 

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
I always told the tweedles if you're bored you're boring. I will not & cannot afford to get a membership at the YMCA, team sports are a bust (proven time & again), & my tweedles peers are beyond scary. (All from Special Education setting or RTCs ~ my kids pick the worst of the worst) kt is terrified of hanging with any of her peers from the neighborhood ("I don't do normal, mom").
 
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