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Substance Abuse
Went and did it to myself this time....
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<blockquote data-quote="donna723" data-source="post: 32561" data-attributes="member: 1883"><p>Mikey,</p><p></p><p>You said, "<em>At this point, I don't know what consequences we have left to threaten with</em>..." Of course, this is the "tough" approach again, but he still has a car and is allowed to run pretty much at will, right? Who pays for the car? The gas? The insurance? Just a thought...</p><p></p><p>Kids start doing drugs for all kinds of reasons ... to escape from problems they are having is just one of them. They also start just out of curiosity, or because everybody else is doing it, or to look cool to their friends, or to fit in, etc. But eventually, the drugs themselves become the "problem", more serious than any reason they had for starting them in the first place. </p><p></p><p>The message you are sending him is that you are willing to allow a certain amount of pot usage as long as he complies with other rules and he knows this. You have only a very short period of time before he is 18 and you have no legal control over him at all. And you say that he has made only limited progress in a years time. Do you really think that all his problems will resolve themselves and that he will "see the light" by the time he turns 18? Not likely if he is still using pot. What will you do then? One thing I learned from raising teenagers is that what you <em>know</em> that they are doing is usually just the tip of the iceberg! Where is he getting the money to buy the pot?</p><p></p><p>You know your own son well and I don't know him at all, but it appears that he is holding this threat to run away over your head and manipulating the situation to his advantage. If he does, you could report him as a runaway until he turns 18 and then the police would become involved. Would he want that, in light of the fact that he and his friends are using illegal drugs? You are <em>not</em> completely powerless here. He could be bluffing, or he could have no idea how hard it would be to live on his own! You can't let him hold these threats over your head! If he DID run away, where would he go? What would he do? Does he have a job? Money to live on? Living on the streets <em>sucks</em> and homeless shelters are no fun. Neither is being hungry! If he did carry out his threats, he'd probably soon be home, once reality hit him and he found out that those nightly dinners don't miraculously appear whenever you're hungry! It may take biting the bullet, taking a stand, and calling his bluff!</p><p></p><p>I don't mean to sound harsh here, I really don't. And I know this is just my own humble opinion and that I'm from a whole different generation than most here. I just think that if you're only willing to go halfway on this, it's not gonna happen! He DOES have you over a barrel!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donna723, post: 32561, member: 1883"] Mikey, You said, "[i]At this point, I don't know what consequences we have left to threaten with[/i]..." Of course, this is the "tough" approach again, but he still has a car and is allowed to run pretty much at will, right? Who pays for the car? The gas? The insurance? Just a thought... Kids start doing drugs for all kinds of reasons ... to escape from problems they are having is just one of them. They also start just out of curiosity, or because everybody else is doing it, or to look cool to their friends, or to fit in, etc. But eventually, the drugs themselves become the "problem", more serious than any reason they had for starting them in the first place. The message you are sending him is that you are willing to allow a certain amount of pot usage as long as he complies with other rules and he knows this. You have only a very short period of time before he is 18 and you have no legal control over him at all. And you say that he has made only limited progress in a years time. Do you really think that all his problems will resolve themselves and that he will "see the light" by the time he turns 18? Not likely if he is still using pot. What will you do then? One thing I learned from raising teenagers is that what you [i]know[/i] that they are doing is usually just the tip of the iceberg! Where is he getting the money to buy the pot? You know your own son well and I don't know him at all, but it appears that he is holding this threat to run away over your head and manipulating the situation to his advantage. If he does, you could report him as a runaway until he turns 18 and then the police would become involved. Would he want that, in light of the fact that he and his friends are using illegal drugs? You are [i]not[/i] completely powerless here. He could be bluffing, or he could have no idea how hard it would be to live on his own! You can't let him hold these threats over your head! If he DID run away, where would he go? What would he do? Does he have a job? Money to live on? Living on the streets [i]sucks[/i] and homeless shelters are no fun. Neither is being hungry! If he did carry out his threats, he'd probably soon be home, once reality hit him and he found out that those nightly dinners don't miraculously appear whenever you're hungry! It may take biting the bullet, taking a stand, and calling his bluff! I don't mean to sound harsh here, I really don't. And I know this is just my own humble opinion and that I'm from a whole different generation than most here. I just think that if you're only willing to go halfway on this, it's not gonna happen! He DOES have you over a barrel! [/QUOTE]
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Went and did it to myself this time....
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