What a humbling experience...

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by lovemysons, Jan 16, 2013.

  1. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    We have sold our home. We close next Thursday the 24th.
    At this moment in time...we have NO place to live. Sigh or lol I don't know what to do.
    I could have titled this post "Drugs, Theft, and Bad Credit"...

    7 yrs ago, oldest difficult child was involved with Meth. He worked for husband as an assistant in IT management for a Law Firm. One night near New Years Eve, he and a gal, stole over 10K worth of computer equipment from Law Firm...little surprise that eventually the Law Firm let husband go. We made 7K a month with said Law Firm...and needless to say, when we lost this client we also lost our ability to pay off our monthly credit card debt which was undoutedly too high to begin with.

    So here we are...I just shake my head. A few weeks ago I snubbed my nose at homes that were in the $1,500 a month range to rent. Well guess what...they don't want us anyway! That's right...no one will rent to us that we have tried so far. Our credit is so in the gutter that one landlord wanted 6 MONTHS deposit...or 9K and one apt just flat out denied us.

    Oh my...so here we are. Our realtor is scrambling to help us. husband and I have composed a letter re our situation to perspective landlords in hopes of giving them a clear picture of our situation so we do not have to continue to pay for application fee's ranging from $70 to $250 each without any hope of getting in the door.

    Meanwhile our house is a "moving wreck". Everything that was in our upstairs attic has been brought down to the lower level to divy up what stays or goes to Goodwill, etc. Packing boxes in every room, etc.

    Oh did I mention...we don't know where we're going to live in a week. Must be out of our home on Saturday night January 26th.

    And...Gawd forbid we were to put our Felon son down on the Apps for apts or homes...no way would anyone let us live there. And as for him...Young difficult child...He is actually handling life fairly well so far. No drinking, no drugging...Going to work 6 days a week, etc.

    Just wanted to update ya'll on our "moving status".
    You know that saying..."Be careful what you ask for"...well it certainly applies. We are selling the house to pull equity out and pay off debt, LOL, However...Because of the debt we have no place to live.
    What a twist.

  2. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    Prayers, Hugs, and positive real estate vibes going your way.
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Oh my, once the bills get paid can you find better options? If so would storage and a motel do until that happens? ( we have a nice extended stay motel by us that some contract workers like to stay in. I met a group from India and saw the rooms, they were ok for short term.....)

    Hugs and prayers.....
  4. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Thank you Pasajas!

    Hi Buddy, Yes, husband and I have already had to consider an extended stay hotel type living arrangement if all else fails.
    Pretty sad that husband makes well over 100K a yr and because our credit is so horrible...no place decent (or for that matter not decent, lol) well let us live there so far.

    It's funny, I used to look back on my childhood with disdain and sadness for many losses and all the moving my mother did, etc and now I kind of long for those carefree days that all the grownups had to worry about. Sometimes bein a grown up sux! lol

    But you know what...We will survive. We'll be okay.
    This isn't how we planned it...but we will work with it.

  5. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    LMS, I am so sorry for your catch 22 situation. How stressful it must be for you. Once you close and get your credit straightened out things should get better for you. Your husband makes good money. Once you get the creditors off your case you will recover quickly. Yes you will have to change your lifestyle but you will survive this and you will be stronger from the experience. -RM
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry, Tammy. As you know our financial security went down the drain many years ago and it is scarey to accept that vulnerability. Due to business circumstances and relocations I do know a number of people who have moved into Residence Inns and also into Marriott Suites for many months. I know it's not cheap but on the other hand you don't have any utility costs, can cook "at home" in lieu of going out and (Don't Laugh...this is for your husband's sake) you can respond to people who inquire that you sought out short term accomodations because you couldn't find the house you needed with such a quick sale. Yeah...that will help his ego a bit. It's also possible, depending on your real estate market, that there is a vacant home for sale that would "show" much better with your furnishings and homemaking skills welcoming prospective purchasers and the sellers would benefit also by having some income to offset the ongoing maintenance.

    I'm going to be rooting for you with all my might. on the other hand I am so thrilled that difficult child is doing what he should do. Hugs. DDD
  7. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    LMS-once again I am amazed by your grace under pressure. Perhaps your realtor knows of someone whose home has not sold who might be willing to rent to you?

    In the meantime, I will keep a hopeful thought that you will find the right place for you and your H soon.

    So much stress in such a little space of time - I hope ebbs soon!
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I would be in heaven in a Residence Inn. I love living in those...lol. Another thing to look at, and I know you dont want to, is mobile homes for short periods of time. They can be a bit cheaper and less strict on their requirements. You can find some very nice parks that are almost country club like places with pools and gated communities.
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    Congrats on selling the house in these tough times. I am sorry that finding a new place is so difficult right now. We went through similar over the summer.

    If you haven't talked to your pastor/revered, do so. Often they can help because they will know if any church members are landlords and they are often able to spread the word. Also let your friends know. I know it isn't fun, but the problems iwth your credit are very very common right now and people do pass on info. Also look for rental property owned by a person or family, not owned by a mgmt company. Often you can talk your way into a rental and get some of the conditions waived if you can talk to the actual owner and not to a manager hired to care for the property. We spent several months in a home owned by friends who were trying to sell it. The realtor loved having us there because the place didnt' look so empty and we did all we could to make it look nice and smell inviting. We hated the showings because they were such a PITA and often tried to give us less than 2 hrs rather than the 24 stated in our contract.

    I am very sorry things are so up in the air and stressful.