BusynMember
Well-Known Member
He's never gone no contact with ME before. He's gotten furious at me, irrational, abusive and horrid, but I always stayed on the phone and, even if I tried to fight back, I did not tell him he could not disrespect me. And the few times he got me so angry that I hung up on him, which you can't do to him or you are auto cut off, I called back in tears, crying, apologizing, eating crow, although HE had been the one who'd been abusive.
I sent him a letter and a Channukah card. Both had short, sweet messages about how I'd be happy to talk to him if we can both treat one another with respect...that I no longer allowed anybody to yell at me. I didn't hear from him.
To him this is as good as me telling him to get ******d.
Nobody is allowed to even ask him something reasonable, agreeing to also do it.
I kind of wasn't sure if he'd actually do the cut off or not, but it seems like he will.
When my brother, whom I haven't spoken to in years because he's angry about something...God knows what...he won't say so I don't ask...anyhow, when he finally calls to tell me my father has passed, which is very sad to me, and that he disinherited me, which I have already had happen, at least I will be emotionally ready and prepared and able to put him to rest without the anger I felt toward my mother for disowning me. That hurt so much, but it was so long ago. I'm so different now.
Since this is cleansing to me, I'm going to share one other instant he was abusive, horrible and did want to cut me off, but I begged him not to. I am ashamed that I didn't just let him do it.
Like my mother before him, my father's main contribution to my health and happiness was to teach me how NOT to treat those I love.
I will always remember his immortal words being: "Not one of your kids ever brought me one moment of pleasure. NOT ONE!"
Ok, just a vent and a short update. I'm ok. Just really amazed that history can repeat itself in this way.
I sent him a letter and a Channukah card. Both had short, sweet messages about how I'd be happy to talk to him if we can both treat one another with respect...that I no longer allowed anybody to yell at me. I didn't hear from him.
To him this is as good as me telling him to get ******d.
Nobody is allowed to even ask him something reasonable, agreeing to also do it.
I kind of wasn't sure if he'd actually do the cut off or not, but it seems like he will.
When my brother, whom I haven't spoken to in years because he's angry about something...God knows what...he won't say so I don't ask...anyhow, when he finally calls to tell me my father has passed, which is very sad to me, and that he disinherited me, which I have already had happen, at least I will be emotionally ready and prepared and able to put him to rest without the anger I felt toward my mother for disowning me. That hurt so much, but it was so long ago. I'm so different now.
Since this is cleansing to me, I'm going to share one other instant he was abusive, horrible and did want to cut me off, but I begged him not to. I am ashamed that I didn't just let him do it.
Like my mother before him, my father's main contribution to my health and happiness was to teach me how NOT to treat those I love.
I will always remember his immortal words being: "Not one of your kids ever brought me one moment of pleasure. NOT ONE!"
Ok, just a vent and a short update. I'm ok. Just really amazed that history can repeat itself in this way.
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