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What a surprise. Father actually did not call.
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 641922" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>You may be stronger and more centered than I am where family is concerned at this point, but when these kinds of things happen to me, I feel really "wrong" for a number of days. I find myself wishing I hadn't pushed it (when in my secret heart I am ecstatic that I did it, that I pushed it right to the limit). Sooner or later, I remember that this is the cost of standing up for myself.</p><p></p><p>This is what it costs for us to demand the respect or honor or cherishing every daughter or son deserves. Their rejection brings up our shame. It takes a little while to get through it.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry he did this. </p><p></p><p>His loss. </p><p></p><p>I find I am more vulnerable in every aspect of my life when these kinds of things happen with my family. Other, older feelings of rejection and shame and sadness are touched and reprocessed. Once I am through it, I am better, stronger, I see everything differently, more clearly, than before.</p><p></p><p>That will happen for you too.</p><p></p><p>Until it does, we are right here. We get it. He is who he is and that hurts. It would be worse had you not confronted him. You merit respect and cherishing, and joy and every good thing.</p><p></p><p>It was a courageous thing, to send him those words, telling him you would accept nothing less than an appropriate, loving, respectful relationship.</p><p></p><p>I am proud of and for you.</p><p></p><p>He may yet respond...we never do know what they are going to do. The important thing is that you stood for yourself.</p><p></p><p>You will never feel like that same little girl, again.</p><p></p><p>This is what it costs, and it's worth every tear.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 641922, member: 17461"] You may be stronger and more centered than I am where family is concerned at this point, but when these kinds of things happen to me, I feel really "wrong" for a number of days. I find myself wishing I hadn't pushed it (when in my secret heart I am ecstatic that I did it, that I pushed it right to the limit). Sooner or later, I remember that this is the cost of standing up for myself. This is what it costs for us to demand the respect or honor or cherishing every daughter or son deserves. Their rejection brings up our shame. It takes a little while to get through it. I am sorry he did this. His loss. I find I am more vulnerable in every aspect of my life when these kinds of things happen with my family. Other, older feelings of rejection and shame and sadness are touched and reprocessed. Once I am through it, I am better, stronger, I see everything differently, more clearly, than before. That will happen for you too. Until it does, we are right here. We get it. He is who he is and that hurts. It would be worse had you not confronted him. You merit respect and cherishing, and joy and every good thing. It was a courageous thing, to send him those words, telling him you would accept nothing less than an appropriate, loving, respectful relationship. I am proud of and for you. He may yet respond...we never do know what they are going to do. The important thing is that you stood for yourself. You will never feel like that same little girl, again. This is what it costs, and it's worth every tear. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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What a surprise. Father actually did not call.
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