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The Watercooler
What a surprise. Father actually did not call.
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 642109" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>Cedar,</p><p>I would love to think you are right in your thoughts about why MWM's father probably called. But, I suspect you are too optimistic and are thinking in way too logical and healthy of a manner. Although it is possible that he realized he had too much at stake....and realized he "cared"with "grace and courage" ....these very words would not usually be associated with a true narcissist. He might have realized that he cared, but more that he realized he pushed it too far and that he is getting old now and he might need MWM in the not too distant future and better not keep her too far away....or something along those lines...he likely wants to put this aside because of something he needs or wants from her. I don't think a true narcissist is likely to change his or her ways and being a caring individual ... Especially when it comes to having a relationship with another person that involves GIVE and take. Just my thoughts...it took me a long time to "get" my father's "different" way of thinking and I've been reading a bit on the topic and I've noticed that these folks can be very damaging to families. Maybe someday I can learn more and help others. It seems to be relatively common for them to never get better, since they very rarely will admit to being sick or will seek help. It often takes a very long time to figure them out. I too really like the healthier relationship being established here in the form of a boundary...no more putting up with disrespect. MWM is the one who is brave here. Fingers crossed that maybe real change will come out of this, but it's not likely. But, again, the new boundary set up is awesome.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 642109, member: 4152"] Cedar, I would love to think you are right in your thoughts about why MWM's father probably called. But, I suspect you are too optimistic and are thinking in way too logical and healthy of a manner. Although it is possible that he realized he had too much at stake....and realized he "cared"with "grace and courage" ....these very words would not usually be associated with a true narcissist. He might have realized that he cared, but more that he realized he pushed it too far and that he is getting old now and he might need MWM in the not too distant future and better not keep her too far away....or something along those lines...he likely wants to put this aside because of something he needs or wants from her. I don't think a true narcissist is likely to change his or her ways and being a caring individual ... Especially when it comes to having a relationship with another person that involves GIVE and take. Just my thoughts...it took me a long time to "get" my father's "different" way of thinking and I've been reading a bit on the topic and I've noticed that these folks can be very damaging to families. Maybe someday I can learn more and help others. It seems to be relatively common for them to never get better, since they very rarely will admit to being sick or will seek help. It often takes a very long time to figure them out. I too really like the healthier relationship being established here in the form of a boundary...no more putting up with disrespect. MWM is the one who is brave here. Fingers crossed that maybe real change will come out of this, but it's not likely. But, again, the new boundary set up is awesome. [/QUOTE]
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What a surprise. Father actually did not call.
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