abbey, when my son got out of prison two years ago, I felt I would stop being on the support forum for parents of prisoners. But truthfully, I had gotten so much support and learned so much from those folks, I felt I would give back with what I learned from my journey so I stayed on. Every day someone new comes along terrified about what they are facing with a kid going to prison. I can relate to that. Even after I left this forum to spend more time there, I would periodically come back here to the teens substance abuse forum to see if I could help here. I know many parents whose kids never stopped drugging, tragically, some went to their overdose deaths... some to prison, some in prison still buying drugs from kitchen help and guards with the money their parents scrimp to send them for toiletries. I do not know how to stop anyone from addiction. I only know how to remove myself from the madness, even if it causes me pain to do so-maybe I can help someone else to detach and live their own life without so much pain and mis-placed guilt. sometimes the trauma never stops. you have a lot of insight and hindsight to share. that is priceless. I will be forever grateful for you sharing your story of your son J.